Third Visit to Prison

Today, along with the saints in the church in Gurugram, we visited the brothers in the prison in Mathura. This was my third visit to the brothers. Though the brothers have not been released yet, we all still continue to pray for them day by day. 

This time, I personally came to fellowship some important matters related to the official literature service as I will be fellowshipping with the brothers serving in the work in India in the coming week. I felt it best to bring the matters to fellowship with my coordinating brother first before I presented it to other brothers. Except for the prison wall, I still felt that I am still serving in oneness with my brothers. As usual, I brought whatever official matters to him and only if we both feel good in oneness and one accord, then only I will take the further step. My brother has been my completer like "the Urim and the Thummim." What a blessing to serve in coordination!. What a grace not to be able to make any crucial decisions without fellowshipping with the one the Lord has ordained for me!

Today, I also brought to my brother the person I have been considering for a new director to be brought into the literature service. I have been carrying this burden for many years now, and today I revealed it to my brother. I mentioned to the other board of directors some months ago. But to move forward with this proposal, I still need to fellowship with the brothers serving in the work in India. 

Though I fellowshipped what has been in my heart, I do not stick to it. I leave the matter open to the fellowship of the brothers and let the Lord make the final decision through the brothers. Even in this matter, I am willing to give it up. 

In fact, the Lord also made known to me the other day during my prayer time that I completely leave the matter for fellowship. Though I may mention it, I must not stick to it. May the perfect will of the Lord be done.

One good news that I heard from the brothers is that, so far, three prisoners have heard the gospel, called upon the Lord's name, believed into the Lord Jesus Christ as the true and living God, and accepted Him as their personal Saviour right there inside the prison. In all the cases, once these inmates believed into the Lord, they got bail the next day.  What a sovereign arrangement of the Lord!

I don't know how long the brothers be imprisoned and how many more visits I need to make, but one thing is sure, Jesus is Lord!

Praise the Lord! Christ is Victor! The gates of Hades cannot prevail against the church built by the Lord Jesus Christ!

The Self, My Self

These days, I have been so much enlightened by the Lord concerning my "self." Never have I seen such a revelation as I saw these days. Though I vaguely knew that my self was the greatest hindrance to my growth in life and my self was my greatest enemy, I was not very clear who this self really was. Had I been clear, I would not have been offended by anybody or anything. My experience proves that I have been offended a couple of times and that too, not because of the "offenders" per se, but my self, the offended one. It was just the reaction of being misled when being touched. The truth is, the Lord wanted to deal with me, my natural man, and sovereignly used people, especially brothers and sisters, to perfect me. When being dealt with my being was not able to take the pain. Therefore, the offense.

Having seen this vision of the self, I still dare not claim that I will never be offended. For, to see is one thing and to be dealt with is another thing. Having seen the vision of the self is a mere knowledge. Now, I must experience the dealing of my self through the operation of the cross by the Spirit. I need grace upon grace to learn the lesson of the cross and be dealt with thoroughly until I can truly say, "No longer I but Christ." (Gal. 2:20)

The Lord Jesus has given me a powerful key to deal with my self. That is, deny the self!

Then Jesus said to His disciples, If anyone wants to come after Me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me. For whoever wants to save his soul-life shall lose it; but whoever loses his soul-life for My sake shall find it. (Matthew 16:24-25, RecVer)

From experience, I can testify that even to deny the self was not an easy matter. The Lord’s grace and life supply are needed to deny the self. The self is the motivating factor for the work of the flesh. Only by the Spirit's can I truly deny my self.

For if you live according to the flesh, you must die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the practices of the body, you will live. (Romans 8:13, RecVer)

This has been my desperate prayer these days that by the Spirit I may put the practices of the body to death. Then, the Lord’s word will become true to me in experience. 

He must increase, but I must decrease. (John 3:30, RecVer)

The best way I know for my self to decrease is by denying my self. The HWMR portion on the message, The Exercise of the Kingdom for the Building Up of the Church, has been the Lord's timely speaking to me.

The self is the soul declaring independence from God.

The following are some expressions of the self:

1. With the self there are ambition, pride, and self-exaltation—Matt. 20:20-28; 1 Pet. 5:5; Rom. 12:3; Num. 12:1-10; 16:1-3; Phil. 2:3-4.
2. With the self there are self-righteousness, self-justification, and exposing, criticizing, and condemning others—Matt. 9:10-13; Luke 18:9-14; 1 Pet. 4:8; John 3:17; 8:11; Luke 6:37; Matt. 7:1-5.
3. With the self there are introspection and self-despising—S. S. 2:8-9; 1 Cor. 12:15-16.
4. When we are in the self, we can be offended by the church, the leading ones, or the saints— Matt. 6:14-15; 18:21-35; Mark 11:25-26; Col. 3:13.
5. With the self there are disappointment and discouragement—cf. Rom. 8:28-29; 2 Cor. :1.
6. With the self there are self-love, self- preservation, self-seeking, and self-pity—Matt. 13:5, 20-21.
7. With the self there are murmurings and reasonings—Exo. 16:1-9; Phil. 2:14.
8. ith the self there is natural affection (friendship) based on natural taste and preference—Matt. 12:46-50; Phil. 2:2b; 1 Cor. 12:25.
9. With the self there are the matters of being opinionated and dissenting—John 11:21, 23-28, 39; Acts 15:35-39; cf. 1 Cor. 7:25, 40.
10. When we are in the self, we are individualistic and independent—16:12.

If we exercise the key of denying the self to lock up the self, it is impossible for us to be offended; blessed are those who are not offended—cf. Luke 23:34; Acts 7:60:

1. If we can be offended, it is proof that we are full of self.
2. If my self has been locked up, I will not be offended no matter what you do to me or how you treat me—Luke 23:34; Acts 7:60.

We need to learn to exercise the key of denying the self to lock up the self in every situation:

1. Whether a situation is for us or against us, whether the brothers love us or hate us, we must lock up the self—2 Cor. 12:15.
2. If the self is locked up, the church will be built up.

What a mercy that the Lord showed me my self! All the offenses due to my self have been made void due to this revelation on my self. I praise the Lord for His speaking. I thank the Lord for His wisdom in dealing with me using my beloved brothers and sisters in the church life. O what a grace, o what a mercy. May my self be ever denied! May the Lord grace me to deny my self all the time, all the days of my life.

Investiture Ceremony 2024

Today, we were invited to attend our children's school program by the school as our daughter was felicitated as School Captain for a house, and our son was compering for the ceremony. This was one of the many school programs that we have attended.

The Lord has been merciful to us and He has been gracing all our children to do well in their academic life along with many extracurricular activities they have been participating in. My sole focus for my children's education is to prepare them for the Lord’s use. As a father, my one goal for education is, to become a useful vessel to the Master (God). Life's only one purpose is to fulfill God's only one purpose for this one life He gave. 

If therefore anyone cleanses himself from these, he will be a vessel unto honor, sanctified, useful to the master, prepared unto every good work. (2 Tim 2:21)

As Moses and Paul were trained and prepared sovereignly by the Lord even before they were called to serve, so all those who know their God will also prepare themselves and their children for God's divine purpose one day. On the one hand, it was God who chose, and on the other hand, it is also men who prepare themselves and make themselves available for God's purpose. This coordination between God and man will carry out God's purpose.

And Moses was educated in all the wisdom of the Egyptians, and he was powerful in his words and works. (Acts 7:22, RecVer)

I am a Jew, born in Tarsus of Cilicia but brought up in this city and trained at the feet of Gamaliel, according to the strictness of the law of our fathers, being zealous for God, even as you all are today. (Acts 22:3, RecVer)

Since the education system itself is under the usurping hand of Satan, as a family, we pray every day for our children's education. For the lord to cover and protect them from all the attacks of the enemy while praying for their learning and education to the highest degree. So far, the Lord has been gracious to our children and they have been doing well in their studies. I hardly have to coerce them to study as they all have been faithful to their studies. On the contrary, I have to stop them from studying late into the night. Besides, they have been constantly pressured by the school itself for all kinds of homework on a daily basis in addition to the many other school activities. I dare not put an extra load on them. I felt whatever the school gave them for their studies was more than sufficient. Besides that, I leave all our children to the wise Master-builder's hand as He gifted Hiram for the building up of His temple in Jerusalem. 

He was the son of a widow and of the tribe of Naphtali, and his father was a man of Tyre, a bronze worker; and he was full of wisdom and understanding and skill to do all kinds of work in bronze. And he came to King Solomon and did all his work. 1 Kings 7:14

On top of all these, we as parents, commit all our children to God and pray for them every day. And teach them when the need arises in the way of life. I personally have been doing this by helping my children to pray daily. I have been spending time with my son for a time with the Lord as my wife has been doing with our daughter. This is the best that we can do, and we leave the rest to God.

Lord, gain all our children; train and perfect them to be useful vessels to You!

Brewing Hebrew

Learning Hebrew has rejuvenated my mental ability to study and grasp new knowledge even when I am a father of three children. Safe for the grace of God, it would be impossible at worst, and be a herculean task at best, to learn a new language, in fact, the oldest language in the history of the world. It took me a lot of time to study and understand the grammatical rules and language structure of Hebrew. After months of studies in the midst of my busy official work and church life, the Lord has been gracing me time to learn and learn. Till the midterm exam that I gave on the first week of December 2024, I had revised the 8 lessons in 7 units at least four times each. I would not do a haphazard work. Once I was determined to do a thing, I gave my best shot always. And the Lord graced and blessed me in my studies.

To my surprise, the Lord still gives me good mental health to be able to study well. I feel as fresh as when I was a student some twenty-five years ago. Now, putting on a student's head after a long long gap refreshes my mind so much. In fact, I have been encouraging the young people and my own children in their studies. Not to boast, but as a testimony and an encouragement, I even testified to them that I was able to score cent percent in some of my exams and maintained an average score above ninety percent. I myself did not imagine that I would be studying so hard at this age, and also would be scoring this percentage. 

When I enrolled for the class, my concern was mainly to stay put and keep sailing on with an average mark good enough to continue to study as the course progressed. But, I became much more serious than what I thought, and spent much more time than what I expected, and also got more marks than what I imagined. I believe there is a purpose for me to study Hebrew. It may not be fully clear as yet, but the Lord has a definite purpose. I am not a translator, but there is a reason why I learned Greek a few years ago, and why I am learning Hebrew now. Perhaps, the Lord is preparing me for what He wants to use me in the future for. Perhaps among the Christian and scholarly community one day? This is just my guess. The Lord knows the best. Therefore, my Hebrew learning is for the Lord's purpose, and I will give my full cooperation to the Lord. 

I have been brewing Hebrew these days and trust the Lord that it will be fully brewed.

May the will of the Lord be done. Amen.

Blending, Blending...

Last Lord's Day, the 8th of December, we had our first combined Lord's Table meeting of the churches in NCR. In fact, this was also the first big meeting after the prosecution of the churches in North India took place in Mathura and affected the churches in North India very much. Till date, some saints are still in an anxious and depressed mode, especially the family members of the brothers in confinement. Despite all the circumstances sovereignly allowed by the lord, the Lord also led us deeper and higher to walk with Him carrying our cross and following Him faithfully denying our self. 

The burden for such a meeting is for blending, blended with shepherding, for our growth in life for the building up of the Body of Christ. The Lord also released His heart's desire for all of us, giving us the way to grow in life in the midst of persecution, suffering, and afflictions. On top of all these, enjoying the Triune God to the fullest extent possible is the main goal of God. 

The recent up-to-date speaking of the Lord also matched the burden we bear today. The epistles of Peter speak about judging, trials, and grace under the government of God. But the focus is not on judgment, trials, or grace per se, but the enjoyment of the Tirune God in the midst of all sufferings and persecution for the growth in life that issues in the building up of the Body of Christ and will ultimately consummate the New Jeruslaem.

For what glory is it if, while sinning and being buffeted, you endure? But if, while doing good and suffering, you endure, this is grace with God. (1 Peter 2:20, RecVer)

Some crucial Bible verses of fellowship in the meeting were on endurance. We all can endure whatever the Lord allows us to go through. For, the source of real endurance is not from ourselves but from the Lord.

Endurance In Jesus: I John, your brother and fellow partaker in the tribulation and kingdom and endurance in Jesus, was on the island called Patmos because of the word of God and the testimony of Jesus. (Revelation of John 1:9, RecVer)

Endurance  In the Word: Because you have kept the word of My endurance, I also will keep you out of the hour of trial, which is about to come on the whole inhabited earth, to try them who dwell on the earth. (Revelation of John 3:10, RecVer)

Endurance In the Love of Christ: And the Lord direct your hearts into the love of God and into the endurance of Christ. (2 Thessalonians 3:5, RecVer)

Endurance In the Body of Christ: Rejoice in hope; endure in tribulation; persevere in prayer. (Romans 12:12, RecVer)

As Christians, we have been called to suffer.  For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered on your behalf, leaving you a model so that you may follow in His steps; (1 Peter 2:21, RecVer). But, we are also being shepherded by our Shepherd. For you were like sheep being led astray, but you have now returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls. (1 Peter 2:25, RecVer). Therefore, we endure our sufferings and are shepherded by the Lord causing us to grow in life to full maturity!

By the way, this day, the 8th of December, also is our youngest daughter's eleventh birthday. After the blending meeting, we had a family time together at our children's favorite restaurant. This was a good way of shepherding our children once in a while. While we had the churches blending, we also enjoyed our own family blending. 

Blending, blending, is the way to shepherd one another.

Living a Hidden Life

The Lord Jesus lived a hidden life. He was a wonderful pattern of the one who lived a hidden life of prayer. He used to go up to the mountain to pray alone with the Father (Mattew 14:23). This kind of hidden life is the principle of the kingdom life. Therefore, He taught us to do all our righteous deeds in secret, made known only to the Father who sees in secret. Even in doing these righteous deeds, one has to do so with a poor spirit and pure in heart (Matthew 5:3,8).

These days, I have personally been enjoying the ministry of the word. The Lord specifically has been speaking to me to live a hidden life. By nature, I love to be manifested especially while doing good and righteous deeds. The Lord in His mercy had to rebuke me and perfect me to learn this lesson of living a hidden life. He did so by using my fellow brothers with whom I have been coordinating the Lord's work in this country. I have been especially graced to be surrounded by brothers who can correct me and perfect me when the need arises. I have even been more graced to be able to receive the fellowship of the brothers. This requires much grace to put myself to death and gradually learn the lesson of bearing the cross. Thank the Lord for His mercy in perfecting me to live a hidden life.

The Lord has also been revealing to me the benefits of living a hidden life. Some crucial points that help me much are below:

Living a hidden life is a good way of dealing with myself and my natural man. The egoist self often tries to lift up his ugly head when doing good deeds. Learning to live a hidden life is a big blow to the self. In fact, a good way to crucify the flesh and its natural "good" showing off desire. This also is walking the pathway of the cross. This is the deduction of the self for the progress in life.

Living a hidden life nurtures the seed of the divine life and prepares the environment for the growth in life. This is a healthy way of growing in life. Just as a seed can grow in good soil freed from hidden stones and manifested thorns, a hidden life strengthens the growth in life of the believers. This also enables one to harbor secret experiences and enjoyments of Christ, thereby accumulating the riches of Christ for growth unto full maturity.

Living a hidden life also strengthens our fellowship with the Father, though our relationship with Him has also been firm. The more hidden the life within, the more the deeper the experience of the Father's divine life will be. This will cause the root of our spiritual life to grow deep. All deep and strong roots are hidden. Just as the strength of a tree is in the depth of its root, so the strength of our spiritual life is in the depth of our hidden life with the Father. Then, with these deep experiences of the divine life, we can render help to anyone genuinely and deeply. Deep calls unto deep (Ps. 42:7).

Living a hidden life will produce a pure and beautiful spiritual life that can recover, revive, and make other buds and be renowned. 

I will be like the dew to Israel; He will bud like the lily and will send forth his roots like the trees of Lebanon. His shoots will go forth; And his splendor will be like that of the olive tree, and his fragrance, like that of the trees of Lebanon. Those who sit under his shade will return; They will revive like grain and will bud like the vine; His renown will be like the wine of Lebanon. (Hosea 14:5-7, RecVer)

With this hidden life, we must also remember to fellowship with the needy saints when the Lord so allows. Yes, our experiences of the Lord must be kept secret, but when the need arises, we must be able to minister our enjoyment and experiences of Chstia as life to the members of the Body in need. In the Body of Christ, we are all members. We must care for one another and fellowship with one another. Just like Paul did in 2 Cor. 12:1-4 when he eventually shared his experience of the third heaven fourteen years after the incident. That too, when the believers needed to hear such word of living testimony for the sake of the truth and for the shepherding of the members of the Body of Christ.

Lord, grace me day by day, to live a hidden life and grow in life unto full maturity.

Contrary to the Wind

Due to the ongoing case against our brothers for the sake of the gospel, things have become more and more complicated for the believers in the Lord Jesus Christ. However, the Lord is the Lord and He knows how to be the Lord in times like this. Since the intensification of the persecution in North India due to the recently amended bill in one of the states, we have faced two arrests already. These also indicate what the Lord intends to do in our midst at this time. We need to adapt to the outward changes and exercise ourselves to follow the Lord as He leads the way.  Therefore, changes began to happen in the Lord's move. One significant change is concerning the risk involved in the publication work in India with two of our brothers being on board for the publication entity. A few weeks ago a brother asked this question. My innate feeling at that time was that there would always be a risk and that we should be bold enough to face the risks for the sake of the Lord. However, I prayed that the Lord's will be done. If the Lord's will is to face the risk, let's face it. And if the Lord's will is to make adjustments, let us adjust. Sometimes, He leads through the environment. Therefore, I replied to the brother that I would fellowship with the brothers serving in the work in India and get back. After fellowshipping with the brothers serving in the work, the fellowship was to let our brothers abroad know that there indeed is a risk and that they could take the final call. Today morning, I received a reply from one of the brothers coordinating with us from abroad a co-director of the entity, about his intent to resign because of the risk due to the present political and religious environmental situation in India. I was deeply disappointed and distressed initially. I did not know how to even reply to the message. But I looked to the Lord and prayed that His will may be done. Everything is in the Lord's hand, and I fully submit to His sovereign arrangement. 

As usual, as we pursued the ministry portion which was ministered by Br. Watchman Nee about a hundred years ago, I was so much supplied and strengthened. The excerpts from the ministry portion are below, it speaks for itself, and I highlighted those sentences that mean so much to me. O what a timely speaking of the Lord even at this crucial juncture! The Lord is the living Lord.

The most important task for each of us is to put ourselves into God’s hand in a quiet, patient, prayerful, consecrated, and obedient way and wholeheartedly seek after His leading. We should be willing to obey Him and act only in accordance with His will. We should pray that He reveal to us the journey He has designated for us. After this, we should pay any price to wholeheartedly walk on it.

And when evening fell, the boat was in the midst of the sea and He was alone on the land. And seeing them distressed as they rowed, for the wind was contrary to them, He came toward them about the fourth watch of the night, walking on the sea, and He intended to pass by them. (Mark 6:47-48, RecVer)

If the journey which many Christians take is not contrary to the wind, I doubt whether such a journey is ordained by the Lord. We should take the journey that the Lord has ordained. The Lord has already ordained our place on the earth. He said, “The world hates you.” Our journey is one that is contrary to the wind. If we have never been opposed, ridiculed, or persecuted by the world, our position must not have come from the Lord. We should encounter adverse wind; we should not run with the wind. If we walk according to what the Lord has ordained, from the northeast to the southwest, there certainly will be adverse wind. Otherwise, I have doubts about our journey.

“And seeing them distressed as they rowed, for the wind was contrary to them”! Faithful believers experience being distressed as they row, for the wind is contrary to them! In the past few years, temptations have become more numerous and severe than before. Those who belong to the Lord seem to encounter much trouble. Their bodies are often weak and ill. There are often discord and difficulty in their families. Their jobs and living are not as easy as before. Their community and country have increasingly persecuted and attacked them. Even more, Satan and the evil spirits have done their best to stir up trouble with the intention of consuming and afflicting the believers. Oh, these are all adverse winds! If we stand firmly on the course which the Lord has ordained, we will realize that the wind is contrary and indeed distressing!

Yet we would rather be distressed than drifting. We would rather toil in rowing than wander in drifting. We would rather take the difficult journey than take the easy path and drift.

If a person has never experienced adverse winds, he is most pitiful! If a person has never reckoned that the world is bitter, corrupt, and can persecute people, this person has never started his journey! You will encounter hardship and realize that the wind is contrary only when you are faithful in your walking. Only then will you hear a voice telling you, “It is too hard. Why not loosen up a little and rest a moment?” 

He knows how great our temptations are and how difficult our circumstances are. He will not let us endure beyond the fourth watch. When the night is far advanced, He comes to us. He has died for us and ascended to the heavens to pray for us. At the same time, He sees our hardship. When the night is far advanced, He will come. Excerpt from The Present Testimony (3) CWWN, vol.10, THE LAST PART OF THE JOURNEY Issue No. 24

What a timely speaking of the Lord! As I shared this message, I also mentioned how much I was supplied by His timely speaking. 

This morning, I was very much shepherded by the ministry portion that we pursued. Even after 100 years, the ministry still speaks and supplies, that too, in a very timely manner.

Praise the Lord the ministry of the word!

Our lives on earth as we follow the Lord according to His leading is indeed contrary to the wind. But He will lead us to the end and He will come again very soon. Come, Lord Jesus!