Life Lesson: Marriage Proposal

As brothers bearing responsibilities in a local church, we have been very burdened for the single saints to get married as we have a good number of unmarried brothers and sisters. In fact, in my family prayer, I have been praying for them, and in our group meeting on Tuesdays, we have been praying for the single saints to get married. Once the brothers or sisters are not fully open and are willing to take the fellowship, it is difficult for us to make any arrangement for marriage. Saints are simple in truth but very complicated in marriage matter. Everyone has their own natural choices and preferences which we could do nothing about. At best, I can only fellowship and pray with them for their marriages. The rest, the Lord has to come and lead them personally.

We have been considering a particular brother and sister for marriage. But we were very careful in bringing the matter to each one of them. Since the two are aging and we wanted to shepherd them in marriage matter. But because of the complicated situation of the brother's family, we tread so cautiously and slowly. We did not want a sister to be led astray should they get married as the family believes in a cultic teaching that do not believe in Jesus Christ as the true and living God. But for the sake of the brother we have been trying to shepherd him in marriage matter. Therefore, we had multiple rounds of fellowship with the sister and the brother separately. 

But when we revealed our burden for them to come together in marriage union, the brother expressed a very strong disagreement without any specific reason. He simply said he did not have peace at all. In fact, he said since the time the proposal was made known to him he lost his peace and could not even sleep in the night. He requested that the matter be stopped. We were shocked and could not understand him for his negative reaction. Since the brother showed forth his strong disagreement we had no choice but to stop.

This experience made me consider how much I could practically help the saints. I may have feeling concerning certain brothers and sisters but if they are not ready to take the fellowship I really don't know how to help further except to pray for them. So we stopped the marriage proposal and left the matter to the Lord.

What next? A lesson I am still learning. I have been married but how to help the young saints in a proper way for their marriage? This is still a mystery to me. Perhaps, I need to grow more mature enough to be able to discern the will of the Lord, not just for me but also for the saints. Hope, the Lord will come in and reveal who's for whom and all the single saints can get married and be established as a family and bear the Lord’s testimony.