Fellowship: Family Matters

A brother has been calling me these days to fellowship about his family situation. He has been going through tough times as his relationship with his in-laws is not so sweet nor smooth. Though they live together without any open fight, there seems to have been many internal struggles and misunderstandings cropping up among them. Therefore, he calls me now and then for fellowship and prayer.

I am not a family counselor, nor am I an expert in family matters. I am a family man too and I am still learning it. There are many biblical truths that I know doctrinally how a Christian family should be, but I don't stress too much on doctrine unless that truly become my own experiences. 

By the Lord's mercy, the Lord has blessed me with a wonderful family. My wife, especially, has been so much blessing to me. In fact, all that I would desire in a sister for my wife before marriage are mostly in my wife. I thank the Lord for the Lord's sovereignty in bringing me and my wife together. Letting the will of the Lord done in my marriage life is one of the best decisions I have made. I have no regret ever since. Instead, I am full of praise and thanksgiving for my wife and the beautiful and wonderful family the Lord has blessed me with.

Some crucial points I always emphasize before marriage is, the perfect will of the Lord be done; let the Lord choose a sister for me and not my choice. The Lord knows the best and I would accept the Lord's choice for me. After marriage, prayer, and oneness with my wife in all things, is my family principle I have been following.  So far, I have proven it to work successfully. My prayer with my wife has always been, "Lord, cause us to love You and to love one another more, and to be one with You and to be one with one another more." The Lord answered such prayer and He honors it. So while fellowshipping with the married or unmarried, I always fellowship with them on these principles which I have proved to be a great blessing.  

As fellowshipped on marital issues, I told my brother to decide everything in prayer and in fellowship with his spouse keeping the principle of oneness and love between husband and wife. Should circumstances allow, the family should always stay together, live together, and do everything together. Now, because of the pandemic, one great blessing has been released to all working saints, Work From Home. So, they can stay with the family and still carry out their jobs. I have strongly advised any ones against separation or divorce, no matter what the marital problems may be. It is never God's will that husband and wife stay separately or even divorced. My fellowship has always been on oneness and love, and pay any price to achieve this oneness and love in the family.

In-law's problem is universal because it is in the law. When the in-law is replaced by in-the-Lord then there will not be any problem. I have spent hours fellowshipping with brothers facing marital issues and prayed together with them, and strongly chastened them when they try to do things otherwise.

I myself, though not perfect, am learning to spend more and more time with my family. In midst of all the responsibility of my service and also the church, I still could spend my little time with them. It is a great joy to see my children grow and live life in joy and happiness. I pray that all my children grow up to love the Lord and serve the Lord all the days of their lives in whatever way the Lord leads them. I would do my best to give them the best education and the best learning I could and leave the rest to the Lord. I am fully aware that how my children turn out to be is all up to the Lord's mercy. But I must do my best to do what I am supposed to do as a father.

Though I am still young, the lesson the Lord has been teaching me has been a profound help to a good number of brothers and sisters I have been fellowshipping with. I am glad that, I can be a positive testimony and pattern to my peers and the young generation. I hope that all the brothers and sisters I fellowshipped with, in marital issues are graced to take the fellowship. And I pray and wish them a God-man family life as much as I do for my own family. After all, all our family lives are for the Lord's testimony, are for the building up, and are for the fulfillment of the Lord's purpose in creating man in His image and likeness to express Him and represent Him on the earth, and even unto eternity.

Lord, bless my family and the family of the saints.

God's Sovereign Mercy

For to Moses He says, “I will have mercy on whomever I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whomever I will have compassion.” So then it is not of him who wills, nor of him who runs, but of God who shows mercy. Rom. 9:15-16

But go and learn what this means, “I desire mercy and not sacrifice,” for I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners. Matt. 9:13

The morning nourishment in one of the morning revival portions speaks about God's sovereign mercy. I could relate my experience with all the points as experienced by brother Witness Lee. These days my experience has also been matching the truths I have been pursuing and this testifies to the genuineness of brother Lee's ministry. It's amazing, the truth of the Bible is similarly experienced by many saints!

God’s mercy is absolutely according to His sovereignty. Being a vessel of mercy is not the result of our choice; it originates with God’s sovereignty. It is of God’s sovereignty that He created us vessels of mercy to contain Himself. His sovereignty is the basis of His selection. 

If we would serve God in His New  Testament economy, we need to know that it is wholly a matter of God’s sovereign mercy. Through many years of experience I have become strongly and deeply convinced that everything that happens to us is of God’s mercy. All is a matter of God’s mercy. The more we see this, the more we shall spontaneously bear our responsibility before the Lord. However, even the bearing of responsibility is of God’s mercy. Why is it that some believers are willing to bear their responsibility and that others are not? The answer lies in God’s mercy. In Romans 9:15 Paul quotes the Lord’s words, “I will have mercy on whomever I will have mercy.” Because of God’s mercy we responded to the gospel when others did not respond, we received a word about Christ as life when others refused to receive it, and we took the way of the Lord’s recovery when others drew back from taking this way. (The Conclusion of the New Testament, pp. 1184-1185)

I have no more words to say except amen and amen to the above statement. I am what I am today because of the Lord's mercy. I never thought about this before, I never labor for it nor sought for it, but the Lord just made me what I am today. Be it my personal life or family life or Christian life or church life or service life, all are because of God's sovereign mercy. To all these, I can only worship the Lord God Almighty. Looking back at my life story and looking at what is happening now, everything indeed is because of the Lord's mercy.

As I have received so much mercy from the Lord, I also must exercise and show mercy to the saints especially to the ones serving with me. Cases of serving ones not being faithful in their services have been brought to my notice. Generally, I trust all the serving ones. But there always is an exceptional case. In this regard, there are two brothers who have not been doing well in their services and of late, their services have come under a scanner. If it were someone else in place of me, I guess these ones would have been fired already. But the Lord's mercy has been so fresh to me and firing would be the last thing I would do as long as the Lord placed me in my service and responsibility. 

As for me, I would rather pray and try to make things work. I look at all the serving ones as my own brothers and sisters. Most of them have families to care for and their only source of income is the support from the literature service. My heart really sympathizes with them. At the same time, I must also be faithful to the responsibility the Lord assigned to me. Wherever possible, I tried my best to balance between responsibly and mercy. Most often, mercy triumphs over responsibility and I would still care for the serving ones who should actually have been fired. 

In fact, a brother once called me up and asked me why one particular brother has been kept in his service to date when he was found to be unfaithful in his service. I did not reply neither in the positive nor negative. I simply shrug off the question with a simple ok. In order to shepherd them, I had called for fellowship and made a couple of phone calls. Even then, still paid them what was righteously due to them, and beyond. In fact, last month, one brother's support was less than half of his general income. It was so because of the little quantity of work he produced. But out of much mercy, we paid him extra support to make sure that his family has sufficient for the month.

I believe, in the future too, cases like this will come up again and again. As long as the Lord graces me on in my service, I will still apply the Lord's mercy upon everyone even as I applied to myself.  Lord, continue to show mercy on us. Praise the Lord for His mercy!

“I will have mercy on whomever I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whomever I will have compassion.”

Blessings of Baptisms

In the midst of the ongoing pandemic the burden of the church is still gospel preaching. Be it online or offline, the gospel preaching is the great commission the Lord has commissioned us with. For several months now, the Lord has been leading us on and on in preaching the gospel online on Fridays and also on the Lord’s days.

Besides, the trainees started coming every weekend, on Fridays and Saturdays, and goes out to preach the gospel face to face. Though their have been reservation in the minds of many in fear of Corona virus, there were also the Lord’s chosen ones who were open to listen to the gospel. Now and then, I fellowshiped with the trainees on their progress in the gospel preaching. As we considered together, we have come up with a specific goal for each team as follows:

Each team of two should contact at least ten new ones within two hours, out of which the gospel should be solidly preached to three and gain at least one open contact. There are five teams of two trainees each. And they have a goal of at least two baptisms in a week.

Last week we just agreed on this goal and the Lord truly honored it. As we finalized our goal on Friday, the Lord graced and blessed the trainees to achieve the goal by Saturday when two new ones came, believed and received the Lord, and got baptised. Hallelujah!

It was a great joy for all the trainees and all the saints especially during this pandemic time. The Lord is the Lord and He has His way of gaining people. 

Following this, two sisters who have been shepherded by a family called me up on Monday to confirm that the two new ones would like to be baptised as well. On Tuesday they came and got baptised. This was another great news for the saints in the church in Gurugram. Again despite the pandemic and universal fear of virus, the Lord’s chosen ones still could be saved and be baptised. Hallelujah!

These baptisms were very significant as it confirms the burden we have been trumpeting in the church these days. On the line of gospel preaching, two brothers got baptised, and on the line of shepherding, two sisters got baptised. The  Lord truly honors the burden of the church.

May the Lord continue to bless our burden and our labor for His increase for His testimony.

Marriage Pre-Fellowship

 Serving the Lord as a slave with all humility. Acts 20:19a

In the matter of shepherding I have been reminded again and again by the Lord that I am a "slave". As such, I have no choice but to follow the Shepherd wherever He leads me. This sounds like I have no freedom to choose nor decide for myself.  But actually, I am freed from making my own natural decision and expressing my opinion. It was true freedom indeed from the self. I need not try to exercise my soul-life, but simply, in obedience, follow the Lord's sovereign arrangement.

As the church is growing in life and in numbers, more and more saints need shepherding. A family with two brothers and a sister who are all young adult, educated and settled in their career, and yet not yet married, came into the church life. As they are enjoying the church life and are growing in the Lord, we also care for their marriage. In fact, the eldest brother among them approached me last year concerning his marriage. Since then I have been considering,  and in fellowship, with my brother in the church, we have been praying for him and his siblings for their marriage.

For the past few months, we have been considering for him a sister. Since his parents are not in the church life, we are careful to make sure that all that we do is of the Lord. Therefore, we prayed and waited for the right time to meet the parents first before we go ahead. The sister we considered has fully given herself to the Lord and to the brothers' fellowship. As we are responsible for any proposal we make, we wanted to make sure that we have done the right thing at the right time. Therefore, we met the family of this brother.

Since the siblings have come into the church life leaving their parent's faith which is not orthodox according to the Bible, the father definitely had a say when we visited them. He treated us so badly by trying to argue with us on the topic of the church or Christianity veering away from the main top of the discussion, their son's marriage proposal. It was a unique experience for us too when we were verbally abused and scolded yet we did not open our mouth to counter or defend ourselves. Our burden was not to debate on which Christian group is right or wrong. Our burden was to talk to the parent concerning their children's marriage, and also to get to know the family better so that we can help them in the most appropriate way. Our meeting opened our eyes and we ourselves are the witnesses to the true condition of the family especially the father. In fact, that was exactly why we wanted to meet the father of the brother for whom we are proposing a sister.

I personally took that as a lesson of shepherding as well. Frankly peaking I was not hurt by all that he said, as I knew he has been going through a lot in his life after he broke up with a Christian group and now has been captured by a cultic group. When a brother and I went to fellowship, our burden was not merely for the marriage of his children, but much for the restoration of the family and shepherd them into the church life. For this, we would pay any price as a shepherd who pays the price to search for one lost sheep leaving behind the ninety-nine. The loving heart of the Father has indeed been gradually developed into our hearts. Therefore, our heart was to shepherd the entire family, spiritually in truth and life, and physically, to help all the siblings get married in the church life.

After we met them and were about to leave, the father who abused me, apologized for his behavior and begged for our forgiveness. He even shook my hand before I left the house. As we drove back, we simply prayed for the family that the Lord would come in and recover the father first of all. Later, both their son and daughter sent me a message of apology for their father's behavior with us. I replied both of them back as follows:

Dear Br. D______ and Sis. S______,

Praise the Lord! Thank you for welcoming us to your home.

We appreciate your father as he was genuinely expressing his feeling. We understand the pain he has been going through. We are not hurt by anything he said. In fact, we prayed and prayed before we came and after we left from your home. We are glad that we could talk face to face. We sincerely sympathize with him and pray for your family. 

Please convey my love and thanks to your mom and dad. I personally consider them as my parent too, as your brother in the Lord.

We feel that the Lord is gracing your family for His divine purpose. It would be healthy and proper for you all to have more family fellowship with your father and mother. No argument, yet not compromising on the truths of the Bible, but as children comforting your parent.

In this way, with much prayer, the Lord will heal all the wounds within and fully recovery your family. And the Lord will arrange marriages for the three of you. 

Much grace, brother and sister.

Romans 14:17-19

17. For the kingdom of God is not eating and drinking, but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. 

18. For he who serves Christ in this is well pleasing to God and approved by men. 

19. So then let us pursue the things of peace and the things for building up one another.

Now, the matter is in the Lord's hand. I felt I have done my best. And now the sister we considered has to take the final call if she is willing to continue with the brother whose family we have met. If this is truly of the Lord, the Lord will work it out. Otherwise, the Lord's will be done. Meanwhile, I have experienced a lot. That itself is already worth it. Praise the Lord for the lesson of shepherding! 

Wedding Ring

It was on the 10th of October, last Saturday, that a sister and a brother were joined together in marriage. The family had invited a brother and me to witness the marriage and also participate in the wedding in sharing the word of God and pray for the couple. My portion was to bless the ring and help them exchange the ring with a marriage vow. As brothers in the Lord taking care of the saints, we both participated and carried our assigned responsibility.

Since the marriage was conducted during COVID-19 where the restriction has been imposed on public gathering, no other saints in the church apart from both of us could attend. Moreover, this being a family arrangement, we complied with the arrangement. Our presence to grace the occasion and bless the couple with the family was the best that we could do.

My brother gave the word of God from the Bible explaining the spiritual significance of marriage, pointing to Christ and the church. And I gave the word on the significance of the wedding ring as a type of the sealing Spirit that seals the ones who wear the ring and claims the right of ownership. God, our Father, has sealed us, all His children, with His sealing Spirit  and claims His right of ownership upon us. Therefore, we all belong to God, as children of God. 

In a similar manner, when the bride and the groom exchanged the wedding ring, they exchanged the right of ownership of one another. The bride belongs to the groom and the groom belongs to the bride. They co-own one another, and they both are owned by God Himself who is the reality of the ring, the sealing Spirit. And I also prayed for the couple on the burden of ownership and oneness, that they both be one with God and one with one another all the days of their lives, that they both be faithful to God and faithfully to one another all the days of their lives, and they both love God and one another to one another all the days of their lives. That was the blessing bestowed on the newly wedded couple based on the truth. 

The Lord has been reminding me again and again of shepherding. According to His word, a shepherd shepherds the sheep by giving them all-inclusive care. When the Lord places one in the responsibility of a shepherd in a local church, he must function likewise, serving as a slave. 

Serving the Lord as a slave with all humility. Acts 20:19a

I am glad that I could be counted worthy to be one of the Lord's slaves to serve in coordination with other slaves in shepherding the saints with all-inclusive care. In fact, this was the second marriage I attended for the same family. The first one was when the elder son got married where we conducted the marriage and also shared the word of God and prayed for the couple. This time it was for the daughter. We did all these with the heart of love, care, and shepherding.  

May the Lord preserve the entire family for His testimony.

Fellowship: Marriage

These days a brother and I, as responsible brothers in the church, have been fellowshipping and helping young brothers and sisters in their marriage plan. We have also been fellowshiping with a brother and sister in their marriage consideration. In all the initiatives that we took, it was with much prayer and consideration.

Last Lord's day night, we were invited to a family of a sister who has been engaged to a brother for planing the wedding procedures. Though they still wanted to practice the traditional wedding style, which I personally will not adhere to it myself, we did not insist on any of our opinion. Our burden was very clear. Since the entire family has not yet come into the church life, whatever we are doing and will do is with the burden of shepherding the entire family,  many of whom are not even saved yet. As long as the thing is not sinful and does not go against the word of God, we tread carefully with a heart of shepherding. Later, as I drove back home and was listening to a Life-study of Ephesians Radio Program on Message 23, I was confirmed of the way to handle this matter. 

Therefore, we must repudiate all ordinances and go along with the practices of the saints, as long as these practices do not involve anything sinful, immoral, or idolatrous. Although we may not approve of certain practices, we should go along with them in order to give no ground for ordinances.

After we went through the proposed procedures of wedding, the Lord gave us the opportunity to fellowship and shepherd the family. 

Since the topic of fellowship was on marriage, I felt the burden to share my own testimony of marriage. Coincidentally, my brother also asked me to testify to the whole family of how I got married. 

I began by stating the biblical truth about God's ordination of marriage. Then started my testimony on how the will of the Lord was being done. To give a balanced view of marriage which many reckon to be a grand  celebration, I testified that my marriage was arranged in a simple way with the church in Taipei's conducting it. It was a simple gathering of the church to witness the marriage. No pomp and show, no glitter and  glamor, but the key thing that was significant was, the Lord's presence. 

I emphasized strongly that the Lord's presence is to be treasured most in a wedding meeting. Once we have the Lord's presence we have every heavenly and spiritual blessings that also includes the earthly and physical blessings too. I further testified that my marriage was full of testimonies. I myself testified of the Lord's works in my life, my wife and her parent and the saints also gave testimonies. Every speaking, hymn singing, and prayer was just testimonies. Marriage indeed is a testimony meeting, a testimony of the church concerning the bride and groom being wedded to be one in the witness of both God and man. In my marriage, the blessing of God and the church by the elders laying their hands upon me and my wife and blessing us was a very precious eternal gift. That blessing has brought abundant blessings throughout our marriage life. Today, everyone who knows us can testimony to that fact, the Lord's blessing in our family life. I felt so blessed to be graced of this wonderful wedding gift, the laying of hands of the elders of the church and blessing us!

I also testified of the testimony shared to me after our wedding meeting. The brother and sisters came and testified to us that they felt and enjoyed the Lord's presence in the wedding meeting. In fact, my brother-in-law's boss, who also has been a Christian all his life, came and shook my hand and testified, "Brother  Palmei, the first time in my life I realized that Christ is still alive!" These testimonies are sweet memories of the Lord's blessing and I keep sharing them whenever the Lord led me to do so. The Lord is so good to me!

I continued my testimony on how I and my wife started our marriage life. I emphasized some practical God-man living that we have been practicing all these years. Praying together, being in one accord in serving the Lord, honoring the Lord with offerings from His blessings, living by faith, exercising and practicing to be one even in money matters, etc. And I also testified of how the Lord provided all our financial needs to start a family life, and that too, in abundance, and He has been faithfully providing. I also told the family the need for a normal marriage life in today's age of moral degradation and lawlessness. And encouraged the sister to be married to treasure and pray for a normal marriage life for the Lord's testimony. 

Then we all prayed together for the sister who was to get married, for the marriage function, for the family, and for the Lord's testimony ultimately through all that we do. Then, we took leave, trusting the Lord for His practical leading.

May the Lord recover the entire family for His testimony.

Shepherding the Saints

The Lord is my Shepherd and He is also the Shepherd of the saints. He as the Shepherd shepherds His flock through his many shepherds of whom I am graced to be one of them. As I serve in coordination in the local church here, saints now and then come for shepherding. Though I don't presume to be a shepherd myself, the Lord brought saints who need shepherding. And in shepherding them, I am being shepherded as well.

Yesterday, a sister called me and narrated all the bad dreams of demonic attacks she underwent in her dream and seriously needed a prayer. I comforted her with the word of God in Numbers 23:23

Surely there is no enchantment against Jacob, Nor is there any divination against Israel. Now it shall be said of Jacob And of Israel, What has God wrought! 

The devil can threaten to attack, but they cannot really posses a believer as the Lord Spirit is in their spirit. I encouraged her to be filled with the word of God giving no room for the enemy. I also told her about her need to be blended with the saints more and be in fellowship of the church. This is not merely for her enjoyment but also for her protection. Then we prayed together.

Today, she and her two children came over to our home for love feast lunch. My wife and I had a wonderful time of fellowship with them. There was nourishing with the word of God and prayer, and there was also cherishing with human care and concern. They have been going through a lot in their lives as she has been through two divorces and court cases bugging her all the time. She also admitted her mistakes in acting according to her flesh in the past. I charged her to treasure the Lord's presence more than anything else. As she is also now faced with many difficult decisions to make, I warned her strictly not to go by her logic and natural mind. But to wait on the Lord and wait for His leading. Until she is clear about the Lord's leading she must wait and wait and do nothing. The Lord's presence is most to be treasured, without which nothing must be done. She agreed to the fellowship and has been humbled by all the hardships she has been bearing all this while. Then, we all prayed together. After such a time of fellowship and shepherding, she and her son and daughter were so happy and filled with much joyful noises of fellowship in my home. We all were shepherded.

Two weeks ago, another sister called up and requested for fellowship. She came along with her business partner, a brother in the Lord. As we fellowshipped, the Lord led me to minister on the line of "enquiring of the Lord" for everything in our Christian life. In fact, this topic came up based on that brother's last name, Jehosaphet. His father had given him this name as he was inspired by the life of king Jehosaphet in the Bible who enquired of the Lord. Our fellowship was fully in doing the will of the Lord even in business affairs and all practical matters. I shared my testimony of how the Lord saved me and called me and led me thus far. The Lord came to shepherd all of us in that fellowship and we all prayed together. Then I gifted this brother, a Hindi Rhema set, the Gospel John Recovery Version, and a set of English Shepherding Materials, which he happily received them with a promise to read them as well.

In this way, though I could not go out much, the Lord has been bringing saints and seekers to shepherd them in my home. May the Lord continue to shepherd them and and bring them to the full knowledge of the truth.

1 Timothy 2:4

Who desires all men to be saved and to come to the full knowledge of the truth.