Temper

Since my childhood, there was hardly any opportunity to really expose who I was in my natural man. I have some "good" character of being "patient" and could endure many sufferings and ill treatments, even if they were meted out to me unrighteously, I would just patiently let it go. So when, I saw some people bursting out in anger, I thought to myself, "what a beast!" Little did I realise that the same "beast" has been sleeping peacefully within me. Its only that it hasn't been awakened yet.

Since I got married there was hardly a case in which I burst out in anger. Perhaps, a few cases to my remembrance, but in a mild way. I have been soft by nature, as I don't have the strength and the courage to be hard otherwise. So I always thought I can control my temper.

But since I became a dad of one, and then two and now three, things have changed and the "sleeping beast" seemed to have been disturbed in his sleep. Now and then I begin to witness my temper flaring up from nowhere for silly matters, all pertaining to my own kids' behaviour. Thank God, at last I am exposed, and blessed are my children who provoked me to give no rest to my "sleeping beast."

Few days ago, I was so much exposed of my temper. What I blindly thought of myself as "patient, gently, kind and soft" are all natural and very fragile. My own son and daughters made me so angry at times that I finally burst out, only to find myself in utter remorse and repented to the Lord for who I was. This kind of incident seems to be more frequent as I spend more time with my growing children. 

Two incidents I regret very much were when my son stubbornly disobeyed what I said and I ended up punishing him to his tears. And when my daughter provoked me to anger and I punished her. Later, in both cases, the Lord convicted me so much. I was exposed and I hung my head in shame before the Lord, confessed my sins and humbled myself to reconcile with my children. These incidents were precious lessons to me. For indeed in me nothing good dwells. I begin to understand what Paul has said.

Romans 7:18

18 For I know that in me, that is, in my ²flesh, ³nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but to work out the good is not.

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18² The flesh here is the fallen and corrupted human body with all its lusts. This flesh was not created by God but is a mixture of God's creature and sin, which is the life of Satan, the evil one. God created man's body a pure vessel, but this vessel was corrupted and transmuted into the flesh by Satan's injecting himself into it at the time of the fall. Now Satan as sin personified is in man's flesh, making his home there and ruling as an illegal master, overruling man and forcing him to do things that he dislikes. It is this indwelling sin, which is the unchangeable evil nature, that constitutes all men sinners (5:19).

18³ Here Paul was careful to say that it is in the flesh, not in man's whole being, that nothing good dwells. Good does exist in other parts of man's being. The will desires to please God (vv. 18-21) according to the good law in the mind (vv. 22-23), but it is impossible to perform this good through the body, for the body has become the flesh, where sin dwells.  

Lord, grace me with Your divine life, grow in me, transform me and mature in me to be Your expression, testimony and representation on this earth.

The Last Ditch

During war time in the olden days, the army would dig ditch after ditch to take position in their march forward to defeat their enemy. The digging of the ditch is not a direct warfare with the enemy, but without which fighting against the enemy would be practically difficult. Ditch after ditch, they inched closer to finally wipe away all the enemy. Similar is the case with some saints with whom I used to fellowship and pray over to cross over the "mountain."  

One night as they fellowshipped their matter with much burden, I can't help but bear the same burden with them and feel the same pain as they would have felt. After listening to all the fellowship of incidents and outcome of their business, deep within me the Lord gave me a feeling that what they went through was "the last ditch." After this would be victory over all their debts. Humanly I could not do much, but the Lord is sovereignly leading them through and through.

Sure enough, on the next meeting, I could see a change in how they carry on their business. There indeed was a paradigm shift in their attitude towards business; not an easy gaining of big money in no time, but in a way of labor and faith in the Lord and trusting in the blessings of the Lord. The Lord would not do a quick fix in many matters, as His goal is to gain us thoroughly. All the way, digging ditches after ditches, and winning a glorious victory after paying precious price.

Silence...

Many times, in natural good zeal, I rejoiced too quickly in assuming the works of the Lord. But the Lord would sovereignly hold back for a moment, to calm me down and wait upon Him in prayer, with much exercise of faith. And He seems to be silent and keeps me also in awesome wonder, of complete silence.

As in the books of Esther, He is the hiding God, moving in silence; unseen, unheard and unnoticed. But in time, He will manifest His wonder. These days too, all my anxious care for the saints went into a silent mode. Before I would love to trumpet every little move of the Lord in the ones I have been caring for. But these days, its all in solemn silence, waiting for the divine intervention.

Many of the people in my prayer list, though I still am praying for, I hardly contact them as I have not felt the Lord's leading to do so. Yet, the Lord reminded me again and again to pray for them, in silence. But the Lord's move, none can hamper. These ones that I have been praying for are being used by the Lord one by one.Though I did not initiate the call, they themselves called and fellowshipped over the phone. I rejoice in the way the Lord works in silence. 

One brother especially moved by the Lord even started sending offering to be distributed through my discernment. This put me to a serious holy fear before God, that I may be a proper channel for the Lord to move, even in the matter of material offering; to be one with the Lord and distribute the offering as the Lord would. 

Another brother has requested me to part of a very important event in his life, his marriage. Not attending the marriage per se, as it is not going to be a marriage function, but a court marriage with only few confidants, as their case is a very sensitive one, an inter caste matter. This request also brought me to seriously seek the Lord's leading and fellowship with the brothers in prayer. This is also the Lord's recent move in silence.

Similar cases also arose with a doctor and a business man. The Lord's move in silence is gaining them. 

Lord, teach me to wait in prayer and never lose hope even in the midst of silence...You are still the One behind the scene; moving in silence. 

Prayer Partner

Time and tide waits for none. Its been over eight years since the Lord blessed me with my wife. Since the very beginning, the Lord has taught us to pray together and do all things--big and small, in one accord. Without much realization, I found myself to be a dad of three children already. Sometimes, its hard to believe.

 

Recently, the Lord impressed me very deeply about a very solid time of prayer with my wife on a regular basis. Though we have been praying together almost every night, the Lord burdened me further to take my wife as my prayer partner and pray with her more solidly and specifically. Since last Monday, we began to sanctify specific time of prayer every morning besides the morning revival time. Oh it was another big step the Lord accomplished in us! I used to be more on personal prayer, but this time, the Lord led me to spend more time in corporate prayer, especially with my wife. I enjoyed the prayer and it was much better than my personal prayer, but not neglecting my personable prayer either. I have found my true prayer partner. I was strengthened, and she was too.

The spiritual battle we are fighting as the Body here in North India is fierce. Subtly, there will be attacks now and then, as we have been facing it. If not to be preserved in prayer, things would turn out to be a mess. For this the Lord burdened the church in Gurgaon and all the brothers to spend more time in prayer. Outwardly there is nothing much we can do, even though we have tried many things many times. The ultimate victory, revival and recovery will be through prayer.

Since, the Lord led us to have more prayer for the gospelization and truthization of North India, especially NCR and particularly Gurgaon, we begin to witness the Lord's work in bringing people to salvation, one by one. The last two weeks the Lord has blessed us with seven baptisms, all from North India of Hindi speakers. Even the way we conducted the Lord's table meeting has been changed to accommodate the local Hindi speakers. 

Truly, This is the word of Jehovah to Zerubbabel, saying, Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit, says Jehovah of hosts. Zechariah 4:6

So there is a need for men to pray and move the Hands that moves the world. Prayer is most effective when prayed in the Body, in co-ordination, in one accord with our prayer partners. 

Lord, thank you for my wife, my prayer partner! And grace us to be faithful prayer partner all the days of our lives.

Seven Years After

Seven years ago, the Lord granted us the grace to accommodate our siblings from home, two brothers, one my own blood brother and the other, a cousin. At that time, they were very new to the Lord and also to the church-life. In a sense, they were "raw" in many spiritual matters. Even my wife and I were newly married and "raw" in handling many family matters. However, we all lived together and learned together and grew together. Gradually, the divine life was wrought into each one of us, amidst many failures, ups and downs. But the Lord was faithful in shepherding us through and through, even though we were almost all the time unfaithful to Him. The mercy of the Lord was great.

A couple of years later, they both began to serve in many levitical services in the Lord's work and pursued their studies. However, things did not turn out as expected. Oftentimes, they have become my "trainers" to train me in bearing responsibilities and shepherding them both physically and spiritually. Often, I would go before the Lord with deep burden and groaning for them. Sometimes, I almost lost hope of any recovery yet trust the Lord of the recovery. The climax of my trial was when they utterly disobeyed me and did things that broke my heart and drove me to hang my head in shame. This was when my brother eloped; and was far away from the church-life in a state of virtual "rebellion." But our prayer never ceased. Everyday, we prayed for them, even my children would pray for God to bless them.

Seven years after, things have been set upright! The prayers, the anxious concern for them in the Lord began to take a new shape. And this month, they both willingly, with burden of their own will, decided to cooperate with the Lord and His move to participate in the gospel preaching in the most important city in the North East India, Guwahati. To us, me and my wife, it is a great glad tiding, to witness them participate in the Lord's move actively and willingly. Besides, the two were burdened with additional burden of caring for the church and the saints in their localities and their own official burden in their occupation. These to us, is the Lord's mercy and grace and blessing as well. 

We continue to pray for them to be faithful and fruitful for the Lord even unto the end. What a grace from the Lord! Seven years indeed is a year of completion- a complete cycle of transformation; not that they are fully transformed and matured, but at least from "raw" to "ripining" grain for the Lord satisfaction. 

My heart rejoice in the work of the Lord, and my faith in the Lord has increased much more. God is faithful. Even when things are uncertain, God is trustworthy. Praise the Lord!

Lord, preserve us in You, to be ever faithful and fruitful, all by Your mercy and grace, all the days of our lives!      

Divine Protection 2

As was posted in http://palmeichung.blogspot.in/2014/12/divine-protection.html, the Lord granted to our third child, Christy, a divine protection again.

A couple of weeks ago, I was finding time to do some personal work of blogging the experiences of the Lord when suddenly my wife walked in with Christy crying and vomiting, exclaiming in anxiety that we should immediately go to the hospital. The matter was, she fell down from the balcony of our house; from the first floor. Immediately we rushed to the hospital and did a thorough check-up. Thank God, nothing serious had happened except for few scares on the ear and skin. 

Eyewitness had narrated that she climbed the balcony iron railing and tumbled down. Gracious enough, she hit on a pomegranate branches that shoot over the concrete fencing and sprang forth and dashed on the semi-solid mud awaiting sunlight to be dried up. Ultimately, the thrust on the body was not strong enough to cause major injury. It was the Lord's divine protection again. Otherwise, safe for the plant and the soft mud, it would have been a serious case.

On the one hand, as parent, we learned the need and importance of being vigilant and watchful over our children's movement. Yet it is not literally possible to be children keeper 24/7, therefore, the Lord's divine protection is much needed. And the Lord has been faithful to care for us all this while.

With this child, many cases have occurred. Sometimes, I thought to myself and realised that there is some forces behind, attacking us spiritually. Yet in every attack we experienced the Lord's protection. And we need the Lord's protection all the days of our lives.

Even though I walk Through the valley of the shadow of death, I do not fear evil, For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, They comfort me. Psalms 23:4   

Lord, preserve us in Your divine protection; we are for You.

Serve as Slave

One of the most important characters of  a servant of the Lord is 'serving as slave'. Often, I wonder if serving the Lord is so honorable and respectful; yes it does, to God. In fact, it is a privilege to be able to serve the true and living God. But the danger on the flip side is, as seen among many religious leaders, they are serving the Lord as "masters". This for sure, I loathe to the uttermost. May I not be found as such. 

Acts 20:19 "Serving the Lord as a slave with all humility and tears and trials..."

A slave does not exercise his right, does not express his opinion nor does he have his will or his way. He is just a slave; obeying the command of his master without even expecting an iota of appraisal or reward. He just serves, in sickness or in health, day or night, any time duty demands, he serves. That is to serve as a slave.

Going by this generic understanding of a slave, Am I such a one? Only God knows. May the Lord have mercy on me that I may be found as I should be; serving as slave.

I have been tested again and again of my attitude in serving the Lord. I am not ashamed to confess that often I do serve as "masters", but the Lord spoke to me very clearly two days ago that I must serve Him as a slave. To be tested, He allowed some situations in which I must practically serve as slaves.

I had to officially carry out my official duty and had the full right to decide on a matter and do it officially as I deemed it right. But the Lord reminded me that I should serve as a slave, and the way I discharged my duty was with the exercise of my spirit in prayer, and humbled myself to take the lower ground and did the work. It was indeed such a joy to learn this lesson of life!

Two days ago a brother invited me for a love-feast with new ones without proper information of the timing, and of course, I had to drive too. As I did so I took a route which I knew for sure was better, but on his suggestion I changed the route, accepting what he said and what my spirit "amened". But the route was experienced to be very bad for driving and time consuming. However, I exercised not to express any vindication of my original plan, but he himself apologised for his suggestion. 

Later, I had to wait for more than an hour for the actual love-feast to start. I opined to myself if I was informed of the proper time I could have better utilized this one hour prior to the feast. But the Lord reminded me that I am just a slave, and as such, "what right do I have?" I better repent for not having a proper attitude of a slave. It eventually turned out  that I used that time for prayer; praying specifically for some new ones and contact them by phone and texting. It was a sweet hour of prayer and shepherding indeed. Of course, the love-feat was very rich and the time spent with the new ones was great!   

Yesterday, as we prayed and fellowship on the distribution of the ministry books I proposed that we pray-read this verse, "Serving the Lord as slave with all humility and tears and trials...,"  it was such a timely speaking of the Lord. All serving ones were so much supplied by this simple verse. In fact, we were adjusted in the way we serve our God, especially our attitude in dealing with the believers and our clients. What a timely speaking of the Lord it was, and it still is!

Lord, grant me the grace to serve You as slave, with all humility and tears and trial. May I be found as "a faithful and prudent slave."