Being Read

“And I saw in the midst of the throne and of the four living creatures and in the midst of the elders a Lamb standing as having just been slain, having seven horns and seven eyes, which are the seven Spirits of God sent forth into all the earth.” Revelation of John 5:6 RecVer 

Every coworker fellowship of the Lord’s move in India that I have attended had always been a time of spiritual examination. The seven Spirits of God with it's seven eyes searched deep within me, enlightening me to see my inward situation as far as my participation in the propagation work was concerned. I could see myself where I had been, all my short comings, especially. The light of the Lord just shone on me through the brothers' fellowship. Though such meeting was not for the ministry of the word for the supply of life, yet I received much light and life supply. Though much of the fellowship was not directly related to me nor my service nor for my locality, yet every point of fellowship seemed as though everything was directed to me. The shining of the Lord’s light was so strong through the work fellowship that I could only silently repent before the Lord for my failures and short comings. Through the brothers' fellowship I had been taught, time and again. Only that I may learn and be perfected through this fellowship. 

When the brothers presented the situation of the churches in their states and regions with statistics, I could see the real situation of the locality I have been in. Though my locality was not presented, in my mind I could see the real situation of the local church. I stood condemned for not being able to work out anything fruitful as far as the increase in number was concerned. I lamented the weak spiritual situation of myself, my family, and also of the saints. Inwardly, I can't help but groan for our situation. I could only pray for the Lord’s forgiveness for all my sins and failures, sought for the Lord’s grace and mercy, and trusted the Lord for His blessing.

The seven eyes of the Spirit had been reading me and letting me known my real situation. I believe, through this reading, the Spirit also has been infusing Himself to intensify me for His move for the increase of Chirst in the church. O what a blessed time of reviewing my spiritual condition before the Lord! It was indeed a tine if regular "medical check-up" at God’s examination table. Yes, it was indeed of time for a new beginning again. O Lord Jesus!

Thank the Lord that He loves me. Therefore, the seven Spirit of the Lord has been reading me; shining, exposing, searching, and infusing. 

Lord, continue Your shining and searching. Sanctify me Lord! Read me and lead me. Amen.

Being a Channel Only

Channels only, blessed Master,
But with all Thy wondrous grace,

Flowing through us, Thou canst use us

Every hour in every place.

Hymns 268, chorus 

The chorus of hymns 268 has been my experience as a Christian. Since I got saved, the Lord has been showing mercy on me to be a channel to a good number of people. In fact, my prayers the moment I got saved were for the salvation of my whole household. The Lord answered those prayers in due time. All my immediate family members have all been saved and still I am praying for the salavation of all my distant relatives too. Even by prayers, I realised that I could be a channel for the Lord's divine life to flow through.

As far as the gospel is concerned, I have also been praying for many of my classmates and teachers in my college and university, many prominent personalities the Lord burdened me for prayers, and uncountable number of gospel friends. I believe, the Lord, in due time, will flow His life to them. Perhaps, through me or any other channel. My burden is for their salvation. It's upto the Lord whose channel He will use.

Besides, the Lord also has been gracing me the experience of being a channel to supply the needs of many needy saints. Apart from the life supply, financial supply too also passes through me. I make it clear here. The source of the finance has never been mine. It has always been from the Lord through some saints. A huge amount of offering has been transferred through me to many saints for the past many years. As long as the Lord pleases to use me in this way, I am glad to be channel only. The reason for mentioning this point is stated below.

Since the Lord used me as a channel to supply the financial needs of many needy saints, some of these ones who received the financial offering often thought that I was the one who offered to them. But I am not. So when they were in urgent need for financial help, they took the freedom to mention to me their financial needs boldly which I really did not like it.  How I wish to hide myself even from being a channel. But there is no way, for all the offerings were transfered from my bank account to theirs. And that's the only way I could offer.

In the past few weeks and months, I have been contacted by some of these dear siants making me known again and again of their financial needs. I felt very uneasy and fearful deep within. For I know I am not the source. I supply only when I was supplied to supply. I have been serving as a channel only to route the financial offerings to many needy saints in India. And I will continue to do so as long as the Lord pleases to use me as a channel only. But the source of the money has never been mine. It was the Lord’s provision through some saints. So when being contacted foe financial help, I just kept quite and prayed for them that the Lord would meet their needs and that they would look to the Lord only to meet their needs. In fact, in a couple of cases, I let them know that they should look to the Lord only and used to quote a Bible verse for them to live by.

Philippians 4:19 RecVer 

“And my God will fill your every need according to His riches, in glory, in Christ Jesus.”

Being Recovered

Luke 15:24 RecVer “Because this son of mine was dead and lives again; he was lost and has been found. And they began to be merry.”

In the church here in Gurugram, many have come and many have left. Many who left were due to transfer in their jobs to other cities. Many who stopped coming have their own reasons, most of them were not able to leave the denomination they were initially in. Perhaps, it was due to lack in our shepherding that they were not able to see clearly the vision of Christ and the church. This is a lesson for me definitely.

Nevertheless, the Lord is merciful. One of the brothers whom we first met eighteen years ago finally came into the church life! He himself gave a testimony on the 31st December night that he had been observing us and many times thought that we probably were a cult group as opined by many denominations pastors. He now and then appeared and disappeared. He had been to many other Christian groups and yet could not stay in any one as he found many unscriptural teachings and practices. After so many years of wandering, searching, and researching the teachings and practices in the church life, he finally made his own decision. He gave up all his wandering and came into the church life fully. Though his family members are yet to join him, they did not opposed him any longer as was in the past. I used to visit this brother and his family, and every time I did so, I used to share something from the Bible and pray. In fact, in my last visit, I was so bold to tell the brother in front of all his family members, "Brother, stop wandering around in the wilderness. You know where the truth is. Come for meeting and blending. You are already a member of the Body of Christ!" After that, the Lord used a situation and took two of our brothers to visit his family unplanned. Since then, the brother began to come regularly for the meeting.

Another brother who was baptised and had been enjoying the church life many years ago left for reasons unknown. He even completely cut himself off from meeting with any saint. I tried to invite or visit him a couple of times but he willing denied. I had no way to visit him nor talk to him. But as the church, we have been praying for his full recovery. 

Beginning this year, on 1st Jan, he turned up to the meeting with his family, fully vibrant. He himself testifed that he decided to come back fully to enjoy the church life together with all the saints. It was a great joy for all of us to see a brother being recovered!

In both cases, the feeling I personally had was as described by the father of the prodigal son in Luke 15:32 RecVer “But we had to be merry and rejoice, because this brother of yours was dead and has come to life, and he was lost and has been found.”

Praise the Lord for the recovery of our brothers! May the Lord grace them to enjoy Him more and more each day and gain Him fully for His testimony!

Being Blessed by Being Blended and Builded in and for the Body

On the last day of the last month, also the last day and the last Lord’s Day of the last year, we had a combined Lord’s Day meeting at Okhla in New Delhi. The saints from NCR and Mathura combined together for the meeting. It was a glorious blending meeting indeed! After many many years of being in North India, now I am beginning to see the fruit of the Lord’s serving ones' labor. Many many new and young believers have been raised up in the churches, and that too, majority were Hindi speaking saints. All the testimonies were shared in Hindi and we all enjoyed the blessing the Lord has bestowed upon us in North India, and that too, in the capital city! It was a wonderful time of blending!

Though my family was late to the meeting as the time announced to us was 30 minutes later than the actual meeting time and that too at the last minute, a new one had to be picked up. Without any murmuring and complaint, I took all as the Lord’s arrangement and shallowed every other thoughts. This too was a lesson in blending to accept wrong timing and and meet impromptu need for the sake of blending. The Lord is over all. That's how He blended us all in oneness.

A week earlier, we made use of the day, 25 December, to invite our new ones for a time of fellowship and meeting. From morning till night, different groups of new ones came. With every group we had a time of gospel preaching for unbelievers and a time of fellowship for believers. By all means, we have done all that we could to shepherd the believers and preach the gospel to the unbelievers. The sisters were helping out in cooking and the brothers were busy taking care of the saints and new ones. In this way, the Lord graced us with one whole day of blending. 

On the last day of this year 31 December night, as the church we gathered together and had a time of blending meeting where the saints gave testimony of what that Lord has done in their lives in the last year. As we recounted all that the Lord has done, we were amazed at the many things accomplished by the Lord in the saints. "Great is Thy faithfulness O Lord my Father!" 

Besides, we also released the burden the Lord gave us for this new year based in the fellowship we brothers had on 25 December morning, a special fellowship of prayer and planning for the new year. The Lord has made the goal for the increase of church in numbers clear to us. He also has made known the way to achieve this goal. Now, our responsibility is to first of all pray. Then, preach the gospel regularly and shepherd the new ones. 

On the 1st of January this new year 2024, we also gather together the saints and fellowshipped on the need for the Triune God to dispense Himself into our tripartite being day by day until we are all filled with Himself and be the same as He is in life and nature but not in the Godhead. One key Bible verse we pray-read was 1 John 3:2 RecVer “Beloved, now we are children of God, and it has not yet been manifested what we will be. We know that if He is manifested, we will be like Him because we will see Him even as He is.”

After the meeting, a good number of saints stayed back for fellowship. We made a bonfire in the backyard of the meeting hall. Around the fire we sat fellowshipping the entire afternoon till evening. It was my first time to sit together with the saints for so long. But this time, I deemed it important and stayed with the saints even just to spend time with them. 

All these were the many ways the Lord blended us together for the building up among us. This is the blessing we foretasted for this new year. 

Praise the Lord! We were being blessed by being blended and builded in and for the Body.

Being Nothing

Oh! the joy of having nothing,

Being nothing, seeing nothing

But a living Christ in glory

And being careful for nothing.

Oh! the joy of having nothing,

Being nothing, seeing nothing

But a living Christ in glory

And His interest here on earth!

This hymn by Br. J N Darby I have sung it many times but I never could really relate to it as I still have many things. Sometimes I wonder if anyone could really mean the words of this song. But of late, I began to realize what it means to really be nothing. And I have been graced to begin to understand this hymn and also I am beginning to experience the fact of being nothing.

Actually, we are nothing from the very beginning, more practically so, from birth. As Job declared rightly in Job 1:21 RecVer, And he said, Naked I came out of my mother’s womb, And naked I will return there. Jehovah gives and Jehovah takes away; Blessed be the name of Jehovah. 

The only question is whether we realize we are nothing indeed or not.

Many, including me, have regarded myself as somebody when I am actually nobody and nothing. But it took the grace of the Lord to open my eyes to see who I really am, that I am nothing. Time and again, the Lord uses different people at different times to let me know that I am nothing. It has been a great discovery recently to realize that I am nothing. When I came to this realization I felt a great relief. In fact, this is a salvation too. Because, in truly being nothing we can easily humble ourself and have no opinion or feeling about anything whatsoever, especially in the Lord’s work. 

The main problem with me has been that I think I know something and that I also think I have some experiences of serving the Lord or working things out. This consciousness of "being somebody or something" has been a spiritual disease that gave me all kinds of feelings and opinions about how things ought to be done by me or others in the Lord’s work. Actually, the Lord’s work is the Lord’s, and I should not in any way put my natural hands into it for whatever reason nor give my opinion or feeling into it. What I can do is, I can only destroy, not build, with what I am and what I have. May the Lord preserve me from being a "destroyer" of His work by assuming to be somebody or presuming to know something.

Thank the Lord, in the recent past, the Lord has shown mercy on me and now I am able to realise I am nothing, and I mean it, and that I can do nothing, and that I am nobody for anything. All my natural strength has been drained to come to realise this special truth that I am indeed nothing. If there be any good coming out of my life or my service, it is purely out of the Lord’s mercy and blessing. I dare not count any positive thing I have been experiencing as of anything to do with me. All good things are from the Lord. And if by any chance, something good passes through me, they are altogether because of the Lord’s mercy and grace. For I am nothing. 

How the Lord views me is upto to the Lord, and how others view me is all up to them. But my view about myself is, I am nothing and nobody. As such, I can do nothing on my own. Now, I have been experiencing the joy of being nothing. That said, Christ is my everything!

Advanced New Year!

New year is a time when there is a new beginning. Be it a new calendar year, new month, new week, new day, new hour, new minute, and even new second. It is the state of the inner attitude with the reality of newness. But is is not an overstretched or understretched time event. Spiritually, it is the experinece of the newness of God. This is my understanding of newness. 

Though the beginning of calendar new year is definitely a new year, it must also be the experience of the newness of God in our Christian living. This time, even before the calendar new year began, I experienced the new year already! 

Last Monday, the 25th of Dec 2023, the brothers in the church in Gurugram came together for prayer and fellowship. We enjoyed a solid, strong, and sweet hour of prayer together in oneness and one accord. The burdens of the church blessed by God have all been released with a strong spirit. Even as we fellowshipped on practical matters related to the church, the Lord made things very clear as was never before. I could perceive what the Lord wanted to do in the city of Gurugram through His church. Things became very clear as we prayed and fellowshipped in one accord. Especially, the burden of the increase in the church has been made vividly clear.

As we fellowshipped, the Lord also made the way to fulfill the burden with all clarity. No cloud of confusion as was in the past lingered over our head. We were all very clear the way we need to take in order to fulfill the burden the Lord bestowed upon His church. I even echoed this matter to the brothers with much joy. By faith, I even declared that the church's strength in number will triple, if not more. This was not presumptuous, not a mere dream, but a reality achievable in time if we follow the way shown to us. 

As the fellowship was on, I mentally listed all the saints and contacts in three different areas we plan to spread to. I could count at least ten families in each area. Even when I calculated further the strength in each area, I could count at least a score or two. Totalling upto to a century which has also been the goal for the local church in a city in NCR. This is very much achievable. Not humanly boasting, but the Lord has shown us the way. Which if we coordinate with Him, He will definitely do it.

The way entailed the formation of vital groups among brothers in each area. These brothers being blended and builded up must shepherd one another and other younger or newer brothers in the Lord. This is the preparation of the structure for the building of the church. Then, others saints in those areas can be added in gradually. Besides, the maintaining and reading of the church's statistics should be the reading of the saints issuing in shepherding. Therefore, caring for the new ones to the extend of adopting home delivery of spiritual food to the saints in need, regular home meeting and group meeting with the help of the Life-studies. Shepherding Materials, HWMRs, and relevant ministry materials. In this way, the increase can be brought forth in a very define way.

After this fellowship, all my "cloudy burden" for the church which I have been bearing in my heart with much heaviness has been lifted up! To me, it's a new year! It's an advanced new year! Perhaps, new year has arrived earlier. 

Lord, thank You for the new year with new burden and new way!

Not I But Christ

“I am crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but it is Christ who lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live in faith, the faith of the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.” (Galatians 2:20, RecVer)

This is one of my favourite verses in the Bible. I have memorized this verse since the beginning of my Christian life. I have been fellowshipping, preaching, and teaching based on this verse umpteen number of times in many occasions at any places. But just a few days ago, the Lord showed my the real intrinsic meaning of this verse in a very personal and subjective way.

I can preach and I can teach others on this verse even with much clarity and conviction. But only recently, I could truly experience from the depth of my being the reality of this verse. It was the mercy of the Lord that I finally could experience the depth of this verse. 

I have been spending time with the Lord in prayer daily at a specific time. In my personal and intimate fellowship with the Lord, He show me that I indeed am nothing. Whatever has been accomplished apparently through me was actually not of me at all. Even if I ever happen to be a channel, still the actual one who accomplishes is Him only. Though I acknowledge this fact in the past, I still used to think, something of me has a part in it too. Well, that is true for God’s move is in and through man. But it is purely of God who shows mercy on the vessel He pleases to choose. The fact that He happens to choose me when He could have chosen many others is a good enough reason to realize that it was, I am not but Christ.

In the past, if I had a good living and an acceptable work at least to my own satisfaction, I still thought that something "good in me" was used by God. Though I would never acknowledge this fact openly, deep within there indeed was the feeling. So somehow, something good in me had influence on the outcome of the works accomplished. This was the hidden feeling. But now, the Lord has shown me that even in the depth of my failures, still He accomplishes His work. If it was so when I felt my living was good and proper I would somehow infer that because of my goodness the Lord pleased to use me. But now when I had the opposite experience; when I was at my lowest pit and utter sinful and shameful failure, still He uses me as when I was in my height of goodness. This proves to me that, my so called goodness or badness was not the criteria for Him to use me. Whatever my condition may be, He is still the same. In my goodness, He is. In my badness, He is. In whatever state I am in, He still is the same. So, it is not me at all, it is Christ. He is sovereign to choose whomever He wishes. Ultimately, His work is done by Him only, though through man.

Last Lord’s day, we had the last gospel meeting for the year 2023. The brothers arranged the strengthening word as my portion. In fact, this was the first time I ever participated in the gospel meeting this year. Deep within, I wish other brothers could function instead of me. That's why, I had been trying to let other brothers function more and begin to pass the baton of responsibility whatever I used to hold to other brothers. But this arrangement was made in my absence even without my consent, I accepted the Lord’s arrangement.

This time, I ceased to depend on my experience or anything related to me. I only prayed that He would speak His timely word. I am just a channel, nothing more nothing less. Yes, just a channel. I ceased from any kind of human effort to influence the outcome of this meeting. I have completely stopped that. Let the Lord speak. Let Him do His work. Not me. This was my genuine feeling and this was how I prepared for this gospel meeting. I could testify, I had not exerted any human effort this time as I used to do before. When the time came for me to function, I just let the Lord speak and follow His leading. The conclusion of the gospel meeting was, it was strong in spirit. All the saints and new ones were led to come to Jesus! This taught me one very important lesson, "Not I But Christ".

O what a relieve to learn this lesson finally! O what a grace to learn that it is not I but Christ! O what a salvation from self this is! O what a blessing to live Christ and not I!