Lesson from Benson

For the past few days, I have been watching and listening to Br. Benson Phillips' personal testimony,  two videos on "A Meeting to Remember Brother Benson Philips", one in Irving and the other in Anaheim. I personally never met Brother Benson Phillips, but I have listened to a good number of the messages he ministered during the annual feasts, mostly the Summer and Winter Training. My first impression was that his English was comparatively hard to understand and I had no idea who this brother was until later after he went to be with the Lord.

His personal testimony was very impressive and I could relate to him the way he studied the ministry literature and how he made a decision to take the way of the Lord's recovery by closely following the ministry of the age. In this regard, his testimony was very similar to mine. One very important lesson I learned from his life is the matter of coordination. He very well coordinated with the Lord in His move to the extent of giving up his own opinion immediately and following the Lord's leading through the brother's fellowship. No wonder the Lord used and blessed him so much in his service.

As I listened to the myriad of testimony from his family, wife, children, and grandchildren, I simply worship the Lord for such a pattern he was. Though I never met him personally, now I see him in my spirit. I could visualize what kind of person he had been as a family man at the same time being fully absolute in the ministry. I am so much impressed by his lovability and friendliness with his family. He seems to love his family so much and spent a lot of time with them. This is an encouraging truth for me. At the same time, he was absolute for the Lord's ministry too. No wonder, the Lord used him very much wherever He sent him. Be it in the USA or Russia or elsewhere, he had built up the local churches where he served. What a pattern!

AND
One striking point about him as testified by a coworker in the West is his middle name. First, he asked, what is Benson Phillips' middle name? Nobody replied. Then he said, he had a secret and invisible middle name and wrote it on the blue board with white chalk, "AND." Then he explained that AND means coordination. Wherever the Lord sent him to serve he served in coordination. Benson AND brother so and so in this place, Benson AND brother so and so in that place. What a life! Then the coworker asked, "Who is your AND?" Only if you have an AND then can you serve fruitfully.

As I reflect on my service, I am thankful to the Lord that I can testify that He gave me an AND! Wherever I served and am serving, I have my AND too; Palmei and so and so in my literature service, Palmei AND so and so in my distribution journeys, Palmei AND so and so in different parts of India propagation.

Praise the Lord for such a testimony! May the Lord grace me to be a useful vessel to Him and imitate the ones who have gone before me; Brother Benson, Brother Lee, Brother Nee, Brother Paul, and the Lord Jesus Christ.

Suspicion Versus Sovereignty

Suspicion is an indicator of a person's inward state concerning what he cares for. This suspicion could be a warning for timely action. Or, it could also be an over-concerned mental attitude towards a person, matter, or thing. 

Last week, I had a suspicion of a brother's behavior toward a sister. Since it involved my own family member, I turned my suspicion into a point of perfecting fellowship without condemning or accusing anyone. This matter triggered in me my need to be on the alert about the people that I care for. I cannot blindly let things go by. Sometimes, the enemy may try to destroy the testimony of the saints and the church through improper relationships. I must stand up and act based on the suspicion that alerted me.  In many cases, the Spirit within me gave me a suspicious feeling, and later upon further investigation, it confirmed my suspicion. Of course, sometimes, though my suspicion may be wrong, still it gave me the ground to be aware and take necessary action before the enemy can do anything.

As I fellowshipped my concern to the sister, I felt that it was right for me to do it as a brother who cares for her well-being. In fact, as I took the matter to the Lord in prayer, the Lord also confirmed that the action I took was positive. Besides, He enlightened me with the matter of His sovereignty. 

When all things work together for good according to the Lord's arrangement and sovereignty, my suspicion has no validity. Whether positive or negative, my feeling does not mean anything. What matters most is the Lord's sovereignty. He is sovereign and He will carry out His heart's desire. So I need not worry about anything as the Lord's sovereignty will not allow anything that He does not allow. With the realization of the Lord's sovereignty, I am at peace to accept whatever the Lord arranged.

What a lesson! The suspicion was good for me to use for fellowship. And the knowledge about God's sovereignty kept me at peace to accept whatever the Lord arranges according to His sovereignty. This is a very precious lesson I have learned of late.

I do believe, now I know how to handle suspicion. Take necessary action and trust the Lord's sovereignty.

Repair, Repair, and Repair

Our family has a very unique feature when it comes to house management. Be it in Manipur, my hometown, or in Taipei, my wife's home, or in Gurugram, where we presently live, we are very good at making things work by repairing and reapring until they cannot be repaired any further. These repairing works are related to our household items, like Washing machines, fridges, or any gadgets. In this way, we save on the wastage of workable items and also save on avoidable expenditures.

For the past few weeks, I have been repairing household stuff. In fact, we can easily afford to buy new gadgets if we wanted to. But I considered the items and found that they could be repaired. I did not hesitate to fix them instead of buying new ones. I did my own homework, researched thoroughly what could possibly be the problem of the gadgets not working, and when I found out the solution, I fix them instead. 

One other reason for fixing things and not buying new ones is that the house we live in itself is pretty old in terms of construction. There have been many leakages and broken furniture that I have been repairing all these years and somehow make them work and make the house livable.  When it rained, there will be leakages, all the faucets are old ones and some of them have water leakage problems. The doors and windows are all broken too and need fixing. With such a physical condition of the house, I do not find it worth buying new gadgets for this house. Only if one day the Lord will lead me to a new house, then only I probably will think of buying new gadgets.

My wife and I have been one in almost every matter. I can hardly recall anything that we are not one with one another. Perhaps, in some minute matters, which we easily resolved immediately. The Lord has been taking care of all our needs and He has been richly providing all that we need. Though the Lord has blessed us enough to even upgrade our standard of living, we both felt to live a simple life instead. We treasure the presence of the Lord and the usefulness of our house much more than the physical comfort or better look we could upgrade the house to. Maybe the time will come soon. Until then, we are happy and content with what we have and what we have been doing.

To me, the key thing is the Lord's presence in our home and the usefulness of the church. Saints' kids will come and have a good time on the weekends when we have the church meeting in the meeting hall on the ground floor of the same building where we live on the first floor. Therefore, I would rather repair and repair and make things work at a minimal expense.  I am happy with this lifestyle and all my family members are quite happy too. What more do we need in a home sweet home where the Lord's presence and blessing are in abundance?

We are very content with what the Lord has blessed us with.

Lord, preserve our hearts and lives in simplicity and sincerity to enjoy Your sweet presence and be useful to You and be a blessing to Your church.

Base in My Own Sight

And I will yet be more lightly esteemed than this, and I will be base in my own sight; but by the female servants of whom you have spoken, by them will I be honored. 2 Samuel 6:22

What do I think about myself? Not what people think about me. Not even what God thinks about me. But what do I think about myself? This is the million-dollar question I have to answer to myself and to God.

In my own sight, I should be base, considering myself as nobody and nothing. All self-pride and self-boasting must be crucified. This is a lesson I must learn daily. My ugly self should never raise his head. This is a matter of my heart. Only if I knew God and myself, then I will be able to deny myself and take the cross to deal with myself. This should not merely be a truth that I know or preach, but the truth that I practice and live by daily. O what grace I need from the Lord to live out this reality of being base in my own sight. 

David having been dealt with by the Lord through much affliction reckoned himself as nothing when it came to the things of God. He honored God with his very best and himself, nothing. What a pattern!

With this view, I must never care for my own reputation and should never seek to be recognized. This is a matter of my inward being, especially my heart. A humble heart with no expectation and against exaltation. How much I can be useful to the Lord depends upon how much I have been dealt with by the Lord in myself. No self-esteem, no self-respect even. Therefore, I must think soberly, never thinking highly of myself.

For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think, but to think so as to be sober-minded, as God has apportioned to each a measure of faith. Romans 12:3

I must be warned not to justify myself in the sight of men nor be exalted. May God preserve the purity of my heart. In fact, may He purify my heart. To be exalted among men is an abomination.

And He said to them, You are those who justify yourselves in the sight of men, but God knows your hearts; for that which is exalted among men is an abomination in the sight of God. Luke 16:15

Sincerely, I confess I am not a person who is base in my own sight. But the Lord Jesus is and the Lord Jesus can make me be such a one; a brother base in his own sight. Therefore, I take Him as my life, and living that the testimony of David be my experience day by day, "I will be base in my own sight."  

Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus. Philippians 2:5

Lord, grace me daily to be minded of You that Your mind may become my mind and may I be truly abased in my own sight.

Time with the Lord

Taste and see that Jehovah is good; Blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him. Ps 34:8

Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth! For your love is better than wine. Draw me; we will run after you — The king has brought me into his chambers — We will be glad and rejoice in you; We will extol your love more than wine. Rightly do they love you. SS 1:2, 4

The church is built up only by Christ Himself as the Builder and the building material. Therefore today, if we have to build up the church it must be "Not I but Christ." The way to build up the church is by experiencing and enjoying Christ in all His riches. 

As types in the Old Testament, God used David to prepare the materials, the land, and the person to build up the temple in Jerusalem; then, Solomon, as the builder prepared by David his father built the temple with the material his father had prepared in advance and in abundance. David and Solomon, on the positive aspects, typify Christ in His incarnation, human living, affliction, crucifixion, resurrection, and ascension. The two combined together brought forth the temple of God in Jerusalem. In the fulfillment and application today, the church can be built up only by the experiences and enjoyment of the unsearchable riches of Christ. Therefore, the key to building up the church is by gaining Christ and enjoying Him to the uttermost through all situations.

Daily, we all must taste and see that Jehovah is good. It is only through our enjoyment of the goodness of the Lord that we can build up the church. The Lord can be tasted by having a personal, affectionate, intimate, and spiritual relationship with Him day by day. For this, there is a need to "kiss the Lord and have a personal and spiritual relationship with Him by spiritually letting Him kiss you with the kisses of His mouth." All the truths in the Bible are for the believers' experience and enjoyment of Him.

These days, I have been so impressed by this truth and the practical way to build up the church. In fact, the Lord even burdened me to spend more time with Him in prayer. In this personal time with the Lord, I simply am absorbing Him, fellowshipping with Him, praying to Him, and also praying together with Him whatever He burdened me with. My appreciation for the Lord and spending time with Him has very much been strengthened. Now I would not miss tasting the Lord in my personal time with Him. 

As the Lord has been gracing me I have been spending at least an hour daily just to spend time with my precious and dear Lord Jesus Christ. I would not trade this prayer time for anything in the world. I trust the Lord will grace me to not miss my time with Him daily. This is in addition to my time spent daily reading and studying the word, and my time spent pursuing the truth with other saints. In this way of personal, affectionate, intimate, and spiritual time with the Lord, I am being filled with the Lord and I am gaining Him day by day, bit by bit, through which experiences of Christ, I can build up the church.

This fresh burden I prophesied in the church meeting last Lord's day. The same burden, I have ministered to a group of believers meeting online. O, what a sweet and wonderful way to build the church as the Body of Christ! So affectionate, so intimate, and so enjoyable!

Lord, kiss me with the kisses of Your mouth! 

Taste and see that Jehovah is good!

Life and Gifts

I visited a brother and his family last week at their home. Initially, I had no intention of ministering anything, I just went there to visit after many weeks gap. Though I decided not to speak anything, as we were in their living room, the sister asked if I had any word of God for them from the Bible. In fact, she was ready with her Bible, waiting for me to minister the word.

Then I exercised to minister what the Lord had ministered to me recently on the matter of growth in life versus the gifts God has given to His children. From the life of Solomon, we read his good beginning when he asked for wisdom and God gave him wisdom and understanding and riches as well. But the gifts he received were not accompanied by the dealing of the natural man and he failed terribly. We compared Solomon's life with that of Joseph who could control himself and ran away from the temptation of the flesh, which ultimately led him to reign in life.

This truth of the need for growth in life was so timely for me and the brother and sister with whom I ministered to. I was supplied by the Lord's speaking through me, and the brothers and sisters were also so supplied. They were even so convicted that they testified to not pray blindly for anything but to seek wisdom and discernment from the Lord in doing anything. They also have been preaching the gospel, taking tuition for poor children, and trying their best to do something for the Lord according to their good human concept. But I warned them that the gift they may have from the Lord can even be misused if it is not accompanied by growth in life. Many Christians are doing the Lord's work today with genuine gifts, but how many of these ones are truly growing in life unto maturity?

One day we all have to stand before the Lord and be judged by Him. On that day, we should not be claiming that we did this and that in the Lord's name. But the Lord might say that He did not know us at all. There is a great danger of serving the Lord according to self-will and not being recognized by the Lord. 

Not everyone who says to Me, Lord, Lord, will enter into the kingdom of the heavens, but he who does the will of My Father who is in the heavens. Many will say to Me in that day, Lord, Lord, was it not in Your name that we prophesied, and in Your name cast out demons, and in Your name did many works of power? And then I will declare to them: I never knew you. Depart from Me, you workers of lawlessness. Mt 7:21-23

I have been praying for this family since I met them first. I trust the Lord in His will and work that He would shepherd my brother and sister into the church life and that they would see and take a stand for the testimony of Jesus in this city. I cease to do anything to achieve my burden, but I learn to fully leave the matter of gaining people to the Lord that in His time and in His way He will do what He needs to do. I simply cooperate with Him in shepherding and ministering what He wants me to minister.

The same experience is with the meeting with a group of brothers and sisters from Madhya Pradesh on Wednesday evening. Last week the same message ministered online as well as to the brother and sister in Gurugram. Though I had a set of messages from a book that I intend to minister, the Lord did not lead me to minister those but gave me the instant word instead. The message was,  "Life versus Gifts."

Lord, make me a man of life with gifts from You for You. Amen.

Money Matters

Money is so tangible and so usable that it attracts the greed and lust of a man like a massive magnet. In its attraction, many times man has to go against his logic and conscience as he is blinded by its lure. Money makes man cares for it and attracted whoever would fall prey to its lure. This is no exception even among believers in God today.

Recently, I had a bitter taste of what money can do to people. Having said this, I look to the Lord for grace so that I should not fall prey to the lure of money. I must use them righteously with what the Lord has given to me and should not greed for more beyond what the Lord has allotted to me. Handling money is a big matter and one who can handle it well has grown a little more mature.

I have done my best, by the Lord's mercy, not to be a debtor to anyone. I made sure that whatever I owe to others I must pay it back on time. I had been a recipient of a friend's cow milk for almost a year. I made sure that at the beginning of every month I pay my the due for the previous month and cleared all dues. If allowed I would prefer an advanced payment too which I did but had to revert back as the recipient also would not receive in advance. Now that the milk supply has stopped, I was happy to clear the bill for the previous supply of milk and close the account, once and for all.

The love of money has been in the blood of the fallen human race. In my dealing with some of the local people here in Gurugram, I discovered this tendency of people loving money too much and even to the point that their conscience and inner senses were all shut up. Recently I had an experience with four Hindi-speaking people with whom I had to deal with money matters. 

To a cobbler, out of pity, I gave money in advance for buying shoe polish, a brush, and other items for shoe care. Though I gave extra, he tried not to return the balance owed to me. In fact, I had already given an extra amount for what I actually ordered, but my advance payment became an issue with him and he was not willing to return the excess amount. The love of money just gripped him.

In the past weeks, we had an incessant downpour of rain in the city which led to the leakage of the house we live in. My neighbor's house has water dripping from the ceiling which source is the leakage in the rooftop from the cracks of the building. Since my house owner asked for help, I consulted some known people and fixed the problem. Meanwhile, I also discovered some other problems and fixed all of those too. What I had paid for first should rightfully be paid back by the house owner. But I would not insist that he pay it. I would rather prefer that he ask and pay for it and not wait for me to tell him to pay. Since the work was done on his request for another tenant, I only help in finding a solution to the issue, the owner should responsibly ask and clear the bill. But I would not even tell this to the owner for him to pay. Even when I have the right I would rather be silent and deal with money matters myself and through this others may learn to deal with money matters in a righteous way.

Lord, save me from the love of money and give me the wisdom to use it wisely.