Friday, 16 April 2021

Life Lessons: Diligent, Detail, and Daring

One lesson that I will never forget in life is what a brother told me, "Never take a shortcut; the longest way is the shortest way." Whenever faced with a situation that demands my decision either to take the easier and shorter way or the difficult and longer yet the best way was, I decided to take the latter. Last week and this week, incidents happened in my life that made me exercise my character in this regard.

I needed to take an Anti-Rabbi Vaccination (ARV) on a frequency of 0-3-7-28 days from the day I got the first vaccination. My first vaccination was done at a government hospital in Delhi. For the second one, I had a choice. I could go to Delhi or find a government hospital in Gurugram. Or, the simplest and easiest way was to buy the vaccine and get vaccinated by any medical practitioner. 

I deemed it best to find a government hospital and started checking on it. Even after enquiring from the local saints, I was simply told not to bother to visit government hospitals as it was troublesome, and with Covid patients increasing, it was best to avoid public health care places. I was deeply not convinced by this logic. With pandemics, all public places including the shopping area adjacent to my house were as dangerous as any hospital. I determined to find a solution to get access to government health care by all means. In private, one has to shell out a good amount of money. I found no reason to not use what has been made available. I simply have to pay a little price to find out the proper ones.

With my right leg still aching from the dog bite wound, I went to enquire first where were the private clinics and how much they would cost for vaccination. Then I went to a nearby charity hospital to enquire the same. Then I googled to look for a nearby government hospital. I followed Google map direction and found Wazirabd Government Hospital. Upon enquiring, I was told that ARV was dispensed in another government-run Poly Clinic at Sector 31. I googled and followed Google Maps to find the hospital. 

Then, upon enquiring I was told to get registered first before I could get vaccinated. Meanwhile, I had been driving and moving around with my wounded leg. Due to the fear of Covid, many had come to get a check or get vaccinated for Covid-19. All patients had to stand in the queue for the registration. I had no choice but to stand in the queue with my right leg barely able to hold me. A thought came to me just to give it up and take the easier way but avoiding all these formalities and get vaccinated at my own time and comfort. But I decided to stay in the queue and wait for my turn. For the entire one-hour period of waiting, I listened to two life-study radio programs on Philippians. Finally, my turn came. I got registered and then got vaccinated. 

Now that I found out the proper place for vaccination and all the other detail, I would come again for all the other courses of vaccination. Besides, I can also let other needy saints know about this facility and where it was located. In fact, I informed a brother about this as well. 

The idea here was not merely to save the cost of vaccination, but also to find out the government facilities available, and other details if the need arises in the future. Now for Covid and all other medical needs, I came to know what was available. After 15 years of my stay in Gurugram, this was the first time I availed myself affordable government facilities. Otherwise, private facilities are super expensive and run purely for business. I am glad I could discover this, besides exercising my character to be diligent in finding the detail of dispensaries and be daring to do so at such a time like this when the second wave of Corona is on the rise.

Yesterday and today, I was researching the way to create professional HD promotional material according to my idea for the Holy Bible Recovery Version promotion. A brother had once done something but I needed something better. I had the idea but now I must find a way to implement it. After some hours of research online, I discovered the best and simplest way of doing it exactly according to my ideas. This too required diligent researching, learning, and trying and trying. Finally, I created a very professional presentation on PPT and added all the animations, transitions, music, and designs, and converted it into an MP4 file.  As I replayed the media and observed carefully, more new ideas came for improvement. Therefore, I had to redo it again and again, a couple of times, until it fully satisfied me. Herein was also the exercise of character involved. Actually, there were promotional materials already available, but those did not satisfy me. I wanted something better.  The shortcut way was to simply use what was available. But if I had to add or change something I need to contact the designer and the process would be much longer.

The lesson learned here is; be diligent, be detailed in anything I do, and for it I must be daring, taking risks, and pay the price as well.

Wednesday, 14 April 2021

Happy Family Time

Since I got bitten by a dog, I needed the special attention of my family as I could not manage things by myself. My son and daughter helped me much in supporting my walk as I could not put pressure on my right leg due to the injury from dog bites. I enjoyed and treasured the assistance of my children. In fact, I never realized that they could be a great help and blessing to me in time of need. My wife too took special care of me in attending to my wounds, cleaning them up and applying ointment for the wound, and timely feeding me food, and dispensing the prescribed medicines. On top of all, I could not sleep alone and it was not safe for me too. Therefore I had to sleep with my whole family in the same room. The family bonding has grown much stronger and sweeter the past few days. Thanks for the dog bites.

As I considered the dog bite episode, I truly believe it was the sovereign arrangement of the Lord to strengthen our intimate family love. Time and again, I have been enjoying the love God has ordained for my family. Though I could not go out for a prayer walk, which I desire to resume once my wounds are healed. Until then, I still pray at home and spend more time with my family.

These days, perhaps due to the effect of the medicine that I consumed, I have a drowsy feeling after every pill. This made me sleep much longer than usual. After over a decade I am taking medicine again, therefore my body could not easily handle the strong effect of the antibiotics I was prescribed by the doctor. This makes me sleep more. And I slept mostly with my son and daughter. They both showered their tender love for me and I enjoyed the bonding between us. 

In businesses and mostly in restaurants, they have something called, "Happy Hours." When customers are least expected, in order to keep the business afloat they promote this scanty time as happy hours. In the same principle, what I have been going through now is "happy family hours" when normally I would be busy with my own works and responsibilities, now due to the special situation, it has turned out be the happy hours with my family. I thank the Lord for these happy hours of the day. And I believe, family life should always be happy hours,  a happy family time. This is what the Lord has ordained for a family!

May the Lord grace me and my family, all the days of life, to enjoy the happy family time; every time we are together, it should be happy hours.

Knowing God and Knowing Life

And we know that the Son of God has come and has given us an understanding that we might know Him who is true; and we are in Him who is true, in His Son Jesus Christ. This is the true God and eternal life. 1 John 5:20
And this is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Him whom You have sent, Jesus Christ. John 17:3
Knowing God and knowing eternal life are two sides of the same coin. The knowledge of God that was given to us through the incarnation of the Lord Jesus Christ is the knowledge of the eternal life. With our mind being enlightened, we know God, and this knowing God leads us into the receiving of the eternal life of God. Therefore, the knowledge of God is eternal life. The former tends towards the objective knowledge and the latter tends toward the subjective experience. yet the two are one. Any genuine knowledge of God will usher one into the experience of the eternal life, and vice versa. Eternal life is the divine life with a special function to know God and Christ. To know God, one needs the divine life. The believers are born of the divine life, therefore, they know God and Christ.

In these two verses, we confirm the oneness of the ministry of brother Watchman Nee and Witness Lee.  Brother Nee's ministry leads us into the deep and objective knowledge of God and brother Lee's ministry leads us into the sweet and subjective experience of God based on the revelation revealed through brother Nee. The servants of the Lord are doing the one ministry of the new testament. They complement each other. 

Despite some opposers trying to divide the ministry of brother Nee and Lee, those who truly know and experience the two brother's ministry can testify that the two ministries are unto the one ministry. Whatever brother Nee had received from the Lord and were spoken forth are all made practical and enjoyable through brother Lee's ministry. In fact, without the help of brother Lee's ministry, it is rather difficult to experience the ministry of brother Nee. These two verses put the ministry of the two brothers together. One of knowledge that leads to life, and the other of life that leads to more knowledge. Like a vicious cycle, the more the knowledge of God, the more the eternal life; the more the eternal life, the more the knowledge of God.  Therefore, the two brothers are just one, and the duo's ministry are the same; they both usher the believers into the knowledge and experience of God unto the building up of the Body of Christ.

Watchman Nee's Chinese name To-sheng, meaning "the sound of a watchman's rattle." True to his name, he indeed was a watchman to the believers, reminding the hour of the time. His ministry was a reminder to the believers for watchfulness awaiting the Lord's return.  His ministry sounded out emphatically, point by point, what were the points one needs to be reminded of as we await the Lord's return. Now that he has gone to be with the Lord, still his watchman's sound, the ministry God had apportioned to him, still rings on. Therefore, a proverb is apt to describe him and his ministry of the word, "Although the watchman is gone, the sound of the watchman still remains, and echoes through the believers' ears until the morning dawn."

Brother Watchman Nee unveiled the three points of the blueprint for the Lord's building work:
  1. Christ is the only material for the building of God's house.
  2. The building is expressed locally where the believers are. 
  3. The building is carried out through coordination.
In all these three points, brother Witness Lee's ministry fits in. Br. Lee had extensively expounded on Christ as the unique building material. One of his classic books is "The All-Inclusive Christ" in 1962. On the matter of the building being expressed as a local church in a locality, he, in 1968 has spoken a series of messages on "The Practical Expression of the Church." And on the matter of coordination, he has released a number of books on coordination in the Body for the building up of the Body of Christ. Therefore, brother Watchman Nee and Witness Lee's ministry are just one ministry.

As much in the vision, so much in the ministry, the two brothers' ministries are one and they complement each other. In as much as knowing God is the eternal life, what brother Nee had revealed of God is now being made experienceable through brother Lee's ministry. Praise the Lord for the two brothers and the apportion the Lord had sovereignly allotted to them! Today, we are the beneficiaries. In fact, I am one of the beneficiaries. Not to boast, but in reality, declaring the fact, I have been so much helped and blessed by these two brothers' portion. 

Glory to God! Amen!

Life Lesson: Responding to Attack

And I also say to you that you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build My church, and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it. Matthew 16:18
The church belongs to the Lord; Christ is the Head of the church. Whenever and wherever the building up of the Church, the Body of Christ, is taking place, the enemy tries his best to attack and perhaps, destroy it. But the fact is, the Lord's words stand tall and strong. This is an eternal and universal promised, "the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it." Try however much he may, he cannot destroy the Lord's work. Come what may, the saints will stand strong in the Lord. The present seeming defeat is a step to the coming victory!

In the recent attack on the Lord's work in India for which we also had a special fellowship on the 4th of April, I have a deep impression within that the enemy is utterly defeated in spite of the seeming havoc he managed to create in the Lord's move in India, especially in the church in Chennai. All the internal attacks of the enemy through some brothers who are ambitious, with an unrenewed mind, in their spiritual blindness, managed to create a storm in a teacup. But this incident, though negative it may sound, is positively approving the work of the Holy Spirit in that particular local church. It only vindicates the genuineness of His work in and among the saints. Through such a storm in a teacup, the true color of the brothers was exposed. In a sense, this is a good lesson for all the serving ones in the Lord's work to learn. Not that we approve of the negative situation happening, but that, from such, we learn what the Lord wants us to learn in a very positive way.

I personally pray and cover the brothers who are severely being attacked. I pray that the Lord would grace the brother, cover him, fully strengthen him, and also recover back his function in time. I also pray for the brothers who are the "attackers. May their eyes be open to see what foolishness they have committed in their natural zeal, immaturity, and spiritual blindness. May the Lord cover and recover both the culprits and the victim. 

Amidst such attacks, there are some lessons that need to be learned.
Never rejoice at the fall of a brother. Those who do so are evil-hearted brothers. A delight in other's fall, even the slightest delight, is surely a manifestation of an evil heart.

Never spread a rumor about a brother's fall. Blessed are those who cover the nakedness of their brother. Whoever spreads negativity will be invaded by negativity. Learn to cover the brothers, and you will be blessed.

Grief for the church and the brother where such an attack took place. Pray for their restoration. In restoring the brother there will be the blessing.

For there must even be parties among you, that those who are approved may become manifest among you. 1 Corinthians 11:9
The Lord is sovereignly teaching us a life lesson on how to respond to Satan's attack whenever or wherever it may occur. We are not ignorant of his schemes.
That we may not be taken advantage of by Satan, for we are not ignorant of his schemes. 2 Corinthians 2 :11

Monday, 12 April 2021

Truth Lesson: The Renewing of the Mind

Through the fellowship of a brother on the matter of the renewing of the mind, I read the book online and extracted some key points for my learning. The words of brother Watchman Nee were very rich already, I can simply quote them as they were.

THE RENEWING OF THE MIND by Watchmna Nee

If we cannot overcome our thoughts, we are in the hands of Satan, and we have no way to overcome the enemy. ..if we cannot manage our own thoughts, we are not very useful in the hands of God.
The knowledge of one's self comes from God's light; only after he receives God's light will he know himself.
We should not secretly compare ourselves to others, no matter who it is. Every time a believer looks at himself he will have no progress.

The nous is composed of the power of apprehension and the thoughts. 

A believer needs to have a renewed nous to guide him through his days on earth. Otherwise, he will suffer loss and damage in his life. He will think wrongly of others. He will not be able to understand God's will. He will also think wrongly of himself. He will not be able to properly live his life. This is why everyone needs to seek after the renewing of the nous in a specific way.
If your nous is renewed, you can understand God, and you can know everything of God. The person beside you may be the most intelligent and wise person, but he cannot understand; only you can understand. Therefore, you should specifically ask God to give you a renewed nous. Otherwise, you will have no way to go on. Once again I stress that you must go to God in a specific way to seek after this.
Most people have sin in their hearts. Once the sin in the heart is dealt with, everything else will be taken care of properly. If a believer's heart is proper, he will be able to understand God's will. Every believer who does not understand God's will is in this condition because his heart was improper in the first place.
The most precious thing about a renewed nous is that it can open as well as close one's thoughts. A renewed nous, with respect to God, is able to know His will; with respect to the self, it is able to control one's own mind and clarify his thoughts; and with respect to others, it can discern, receive, and understand the words of others.
...we cannot learn truths from a man's preaching, but we can learn from the truth he practices.
If you yield to sin the first time, you will lose the feeling about sin the second and third time. If you call sin by the right name and acknowledge sin as sin the first time, if you have the right view and right attitude toward sin, and if you deal with sin the right way the first time, you will be able to deal with sin the next time. If you do not consider sin as sin the first time and deal with it, but rather consider losing your temper as a common thing for a Christian, you will commit the same sin the next time. Whoever does not know sin will not know holiness. What is holiness? Holiness is having the knowledge of sin. Adam and Eve were only ignorant and innocent before they sinned; they were not holy. Only those who know sin know the meaning of holiness.
Therefore, the nous is related to our living before God. Whenever we yield to sin, we become unrighteous. We are not able to fellowship with God, and our nous is darkened. Therefore, we should put off uncleanness, improper motives, and unrighteousness on the negative side and put on the new man on the positive side. 
If our nous is renewed and our understanding is quick, we can understand God's will, God's desire, and the Bible.

PUTTING OFF THE OLD MAN AS REGARDS THE FORMER MANNER  OF LIFE

Ephesians 4: 22-23 say, "That you put off, as regards your former manner of life, the old man, which is being corrupted according to the lusts of the deceit, and that you be renewed in the spirit of your nous." Notice the phrase "the spirit of your nous."

There is a special relationship between the nous and the spirit. If we want the spirit of our nous to be renewed, we must put off the old man. If we do not put off the old man in our experience, we will not be able to experience the renewing of our mind.

This passage shows us that if we want our understanding and mind to be renewed, we must specifically put off our old man. If we want to be renewed continuously, we must put off continuously. Just as we exercise our will to take off our clothes and cast them aside when we undress, we should exercise our will to specifically put off the old man and cast it aside. Everything that belongs to the old man, whether it is our speech, thoughts, or behavior, should be specifically cast aside; we should reject everything sinful, unclean, or of the self. At the same time, we must seek the Lord single-heartedly and trust in the Holy Spirit to renew our nous. This renewing work belongs to the Holy Spirit. If we remove the obstacles and trust in Him to do the renewing work, He will renew our nous gradually.

If a person's nous is closed, his spirit must also be closed. Since the spirit expresses itself through the nous, the spirit will have no outlet if the nous is closed.

CONSECRATION AND THE RENEWING OF THE NOUS

Romans 12:1-2 says, "I exhort you therefore, brothers, through the compassions of God to present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, well pleasing to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be fashioned according to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of the mind that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and well pleasing and perfect."

CONTROLLING THE MIND

The most important thing is that a renewed mind is under a person's own control; he can stop when he wants to stop, and he can think when he wants to think. One should be able to control himself in a spontaneous way. After the mind is renewed, one should not allow outside thoughts to control him. 

Truth Lesson: The Way to Know God

Through the fellowship of a brother on the matter of the way to know  God, I read the book online and extracted some key points for my learning. The words of brother Watchman Nee were very rich already, I can simply quote them as they were. 

The Way to Know God by Watchman Nee
However, if we want to know God, we need to deal with God and be dealt with by God.
No one can know God without first having dealings with Him. I have told several brothers that if anyone wants to progress, the only way is to be dealt with by God. If you do not accept God's dealing, you will never progress. 
All the knowledge we acquire from God comes by some amount of laboring; we cannot acquire this knowledge simply by reading or listening. If we learn how to deal with God and how to be dealt with by God in everything, that is, if we learn to have dealings with God in everything, we will know what God wants from us, what He wants to remove from us, and what He wants to accomplish in us. In this way we will know God, and God will be known by us.

No one can know God without first having dealings with Him. I have told several brothers that if anyone wants to progress, the only way is to be dealt with by God. If you do not accept God's dealing, you will never progress. 

2Ch 20:20And they rose up early in the morning and went out to the wilderness of Tekoa. And as they went out, Jehoshaphat stood up and said, Hear me, O Judah and you inhabitants of Jerusalem. Believe in Jehovah your God, and you will be established; believe in His prophets, and you will succeed.

2Ch 20:21And when he had taken counsel with the people, he appointed them to sing to Jehovah and give thanks in holy array as they went out before the army and say, Give thanks to Jehovah, for His lovingkindness endures forever.

2Ch 20:22And when they began to shout in song and to praise, Jehovah set ambushes for the children of Ammon, Moab, and Mount Seir, who were coming out against Judah; and they were struck.

Therefore, we have to learn to deal with God. In our physical health, in our work, in our family, in every detail of our environment, we have to ask God to deal with us.

 If you want to know God, you have to deal with God concerning your body, your family, and your environment. You should not let anything go by carelessly. You have to pray until you have God's answer. By doing this you will learn a lesson which the Bible alone cannot teach you. 

Indeed, a man can only preach what he is touched by in the Word; he can only help others in the areas that God has touched him. What can we preach if we do not know God?

Whether you are working on believers or unbelievers, the most important thing is that you have to be dealt with by God. After you are dealt with, you will speak the reality, and others will touch it.

Finally, I have to say that no lazy person can know God.

Without the experience of knowing God in prayer, no one can have the experience of knowing God.
Any prayer that cannot move our own heart cannot move God. If we pray, we must have an absolute desire before God. We should not let God go if He does not answer. If we can let go of something whether or not God answers our prayer, He will certainly not answer our prayer, because He knows that it does not matter to us. If we realize this, we will acquire new knowledge and realize that all of our prayers must be accompanied by sincere desires.
The most precious thing on earth today is the knowledge of God. However, in order to know God, we need to be dealt with by Him in everything. We need to be dealt with by Him in prayer, and we need to be dealt with by Him in matters related to His will. We need to deal with sin and our environment. When something happens, we need to ask, "What does this mean?" and "What is God after?" 

LEARNING TO KNOW GOD THROUGH PRAYER

Our knowledge should not only be from the Bible, but should also be from God Himself.

We must spend time before God to learn to deal with Him and to be dealt with by Him; only then will we know God's requirements concerning prayer. Knowing God through prayer does not come by accident or by learning from others. Neither does it come by listening to my messages. 

REMOVING BARRIERS

All the knowledge we acquire from God comes by some amount of laboring; we cannot acquire this knowledge simply by reading or listening. If we learn how to deal with God and how to be dealt with by God in everything, that is, if we learn to have dealings with God in everything, we will know what God wants from us, what He wants to remove from us, and what He wants to accomplish in us. In this way we will know God, and God will be known by us.

You will know that you have to remove the barriers before God will answer your prayer.

DESIRE

Any prayer that cannot move our own heart cannot move God. If we pray, we must have an absolute desire before God. We should not let God go if He does not answer. If we can let go of something whether or not God answers our prayer, He will certainly not answer our prayer, because He knows that it does not matter to us. If we realize this, we will acquire new knowledge and realize that all of our prayers must be accompanied by sincere desires.

ASKING

"You do not have because you do not ask" (James 4:2). Thus, you acquire new knowledge that even with a desire within, you still have to ask without.

OBEDIENCE

The reason God does not listen to the prayers of many brothers and sisters is that they have not learned to obey God. If you do not listen to God all the time, neither will He listen to your prayer.

God only answers the prayers of the obedient ones.
..if you want God to continually answer your prayers, you have to faithfully obey God every time, on every item, and in everything. 

FAITH 

 

PRAISING

REMINDING GOD

As the Lord said in Isaiah, "Put Me in remembrance" (43:26). It is as if God can forget, and we have to remind Him. God may have promised, but He needs us to remind Him. We should say, not with a heart of unbelief but with a heart of faith, "Lord, You have given me Your promise. You should remember Your promise." This is exactly what King Solomon did. He said to God, "Now, O Lord God, let thy promise unto David my father be established" (2 Chron. 1:9). This way of reminding God is very meaningful. The reason that God delays His promise is that we may have the opportunity to deal with Him. In this way we acquire new knowledge; we have learned how to remind Him.

We must learn to know God in things that are big or small. If we do this again and again, God will answer our prayer.
"God's will is the greatest thing in the entire world; how can we possibly know it?" Yes, God is indeed great. How then can He reveal His will to little men like us? We have to first adjust ourselves.

Every time we want to know God's will, we must first deal with our selves. We must be willing to lay down our selves and forsake everything, before God will reveal His will to us. Whenever we are seeking God's will, our self must first be dealt with by God. 

Those who do not pray in a thorough way can never know God.

...genuine spiritual knowledge must be learned from God. If we want to learn before God, we must deal with God and be dealt with by God. 

..if you have not learned to be dealt with by God and to deal with God, you can never go out to work because you are not yet even a proper Christian. If you do not know God's principles, God's way of doing things, and God's nature, you are no different from other people. If you can only give people some spiritual theories, you cannot lead them on in the spiritual way. 

May we learn to know Him in prayer and in His will. We can know God. There is nothing more important than knowing God. May we not just retain what we have heard today in our mind, but, from now on, may we be diligent to learn to know God and accept His dealing.

Truth Lesson: Self-knowledge and God's Light

Through the fellowship of a brother on the matter of self-knowledge and God's light, I read the book online and extracted some key points for my learning. The words of brother Watchman Nee were very rich already, I can simply quote them as they were.
SELF-KNOWLEDGE AND GOD'S LIGHT by Watchman Nee
Today, I believe that God wants me to give a message on how to know ourselves. A Christian never progresses in spirituality if he does not know himself. And a Christian can never spiritually progress further than what he knows. Whatever light (not knowledge) he receives, he expresses life to that degree. No Christian can progress further than the light which God has given him. If a Christian does not know his faults or his real condition, he will not pursue after what is new or go on in the way ahead.
The most important thing in a Christian's life is to judge himself. He must consider his own flesh as not trustworthy and himself as absolutely useless. Only in this way will he utterly trust God. And only then can he walk according to the Holy Spirit and not according to the flesh. Without self-judgment, spiritual living is impossible. 
If we do not know ourselves, we will not only be self-confident and self-approving, but we will also be full of self-content, thinking marvelously of ourselves and being full of a pride that is most displeasing to God. Because we do not know ourselves, our daily living will have many shortcomings. We will have no feeling about unfulfilled duties, unrighteousnesses toward others, instances of lack of love, and instances of being angry, anxious, and unmerciful. Although the situation gets worse and worse, we feel at ease and content. Because we do not know ourselves, we do not know how great is our lack and how complete and precious is the salvation in Christ. As a result we miss so many spiritual blessings. Self-knowledge is the first condition toward betterment, because only those who know themselves desire for the better—yes, even God's best. Those who do not know themselves will not have a hungry and thirsty heart, and they will not have the filling of the Holy Spirit. Self-knowledge is absolutely indispensable to a Christian.
Self-examination is a big deception; many Christians are damaged by self-examination. We need to ask, (1) Does the Bible teach self-examination? (2) Can self-examination enable us to know ourselves? (3) Is self-examination profitable? From these we will prove that self-examination is really not the duty of a Christian.
Hebrews 12:2 says: "Looking away unto Jesus..."
Our spiritual living is based upon looking unto Jesus and not on turning back to ourselves. If we do not obey the command of the Bible to look unto Jesus but instead turn to look inside ourselves, we will suffer much spiritually. I have already said before that introspection—ourselves analyzing ourselves and our own feeling, intention, and thought—is most harmful. Griffith Thomas said, "There is now a common saying that if you look at yourself once, you must then look at Christ ten times. But I think this must be changed to look at Christ eleven times and do not look at yourself even once."
The more we turn and look back, the more we cannot move and the more we retrogress. When we look at the light of the Lord, unconsciously we move forward.
Our defeat comes from too much consideration of ourselves; all we remember is our victory or our defeat. As a result, Christ cannot be completely manifested in us.
The way of our victory is not through a constant, unceasing analysis of ourselves. Rather, it is to look away unto Jesus. It is not the removal of evil thoughts, but the retention of good thoughts; it is not the eradication of something in ourselves, but yielding to the infilling of Christ in us to the extent that we completely forget about ourselves. Whenever we think back on ourselves, our steps are immediately halted. The Bible does not tell us to consider how we run. Rather, it tells us to run by looking away unto Jesus. If we turn to examine ourselves, we will see that we are in a fog; the more we examine, the more we become unclear. If we look away unto Jesus, we will naturally be able to run well.
Many Christian failures are due to introspection and self-examination. When Christians turn to examine themselves, even if there is no other harm, they have lost at least one step. The Bible does not command Christians to examine themselves, because self-examination is not only unprofitable, but it hinders progress as well. Many Christians, after a day is over, review the things of the day and examine themselves. They are just fooling themselves. The apostle Paul did not care how others judged him. He did not even judge himself. He said, "Do not judge anything before the time, until the Lord comes, who will both bring to light the hidden things of darkness and make manifest the counsels of the hearts, and then there will be praise to each from God" (1 Cor. 4:5). Paul knew that only when the Lord shines His light can anyone know what is right and what is wrong. If a Christian repeatedly considers himself, he surely will fail. He will be proud and consider himself better than his companions when he thinks that he has no fault. He will be discouraged and see no way out when he thinks about his faults. If our self-knowledge comes from the shining of God, then the results will be different.
Let us read Psalm 26:2: "Examine me, O Jehovah, and try me; / Test my inward parts and my heart." And Psalm 139:23-24b says, "Search me, O God, and know my heart: / Try me, and know my thoughts: / And see if there be any wicked way in me." These two portions of the Scripture tell us the proper way to know ourselves.
..the way is to ask God to search us and to try us. Only when God searches us and tries us can we have accurate knowledge concerning ourselves. Our self-knowledge does not depend on our self-examination. Rather, it depends on God's inspection. 
God knows us more clearly and more accurately than we know ourselves. Actually, only God's knowledge concerning us is correct. 

Psalm 36:9 says, "In Your light we see light." Therefore, "in Your light we see light" means that when we receive the revelation of God, the shining of God's holy light, we are able to know the real situation of a certain matter. The matter will be clear as light in the eyes of our heart. In our own light we can never see light. Only in His light can we see light. Only the light of God can cause man to see the picture of his true self as God sees him.
As Christians, day by day we know ourselves not through self-examination but through the light of God. When the light of God shines upon us, we will realize that we are corrupt to the uttermost. We must have the boldness to be shined upon by God with His light so that He can reveal to us the real picture of ourselves. We have no way to know our own selves unless there is the shining of God. Our own evaluation of ourselves is not trustworthy.
If you draw near to God and are controlled constantly by the light of God, spontaneously you will illuminate the real condition of the people who are contacting you. If we want to obey the will of God and do the work of God, we need to be a light.
WHERE DOES THIS LIGHT COME FROM?
First, Christ is our light. John 8:12 says, "Again therefore Jesus spoke to them, saying, I am the light of the world; he who follows Me shall by no means walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life."
Second, the Word of God is our light. Psalm 119:105 says, "Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path." Verse 130 says, "The entrance of thy words giveth light." 
Third, Christians are our light. Matthew 5:14 says, "You are the light of the world."
Whether by drawing near to Christ, by reading God's Word, or by being with other Christians, all the light we receive comes from the revelation of the Holy Spirit. It is the Holy Spirit who manifests the unapproachable light in which God dwells. It is He who manifests His glory, holiness, and righteousness. By this we see the absolute standard of God, so that we see ourselves, know our own real condition, and realize how we fall short of the standard of God.
The light of God, the light that God emanates through the Holy Spirit, is the first indispensable element. The basic need is that a sinner must see his own condition and see the glory of Jesus.
The progress of the Christian life is due to receiving the light of God, which opens a Christian's eyes and causes him to know the riches of the glory of God, and the greatness of the power of God that is given to him through the resurrection of Jesus Christ. 
Anyone who is doing special work for God must be a person who has been shined upon by God. Only he who has been shined upon by God can judge his flesh. Only he who has judged his own flesh can be used by God.
It is not what we say that counts, nor what we feel that counts. It is not what we consider or believe that counts; rather, it is a matter of whether or not our work is really out of the will of God. First Corinthians 3 tells us the way we will be judged in the future: "The work of each will become manifest; for the day will declare it, because it is revealed by fire, and the fire itself will prove each one's work, of what sort it is." (v. 13). 
"The intimate counsel of Jehovah belongs to those who fear him; / And His covenant He will make known to them" (Psa. 25:14).