Mahanaim

Song of Songs 6:13

Return, return, O Shulamite; Return, return, that we may gaze at you.

Why should you gaze at the Shulamite, As upon the dance of two camps?

"Two camps" in Hebrew means "mahanaim." Jacob, after he met the angels of God, divided his wives, children and the rest of his possessions into two camps, or "two armies" (Gen. 32:1-10). On the one hand, Jacob was so afraid of his brother Esau that he made two camps, as a cleverly defensive tactic in case he was attached. It shows his helplessness, weakness and dependence on God who can only protect him. Yet on the other hand, having two camps signifies being a testimony; dancing between the two camps being more than conquerors in the Body life.

As I studied this verse, with the help of the notes in the Recovery Version, the Lord enlightened me of two things. 

Firstly, I am weak in myself. I can do nothing and even if I were to do something, it will be all out of fear and helplessness. So my only refuge is the Lord Himself who is my Protector and Strength. In fact, all the days of my life, I must take this position, recognizing my weakness and always depending on God for everything. Only by this utter dependence on God, can I become one with God to be His army to fight against His enemy unto victory. 

Secondly, though I am weak, I am a member of the Body, I am not alone, I am among the two camps of women and children, the feeble ones trusting the Lord. And also a part of the two camps, I am a part of the testimony of God. I not only conquer, but am more than conqueror in the Body life with the other saints.

As days go by, the deeper I realize the practicality of this verse. Often I groan in my weaknesses depending on the Lord, and often I rejoices in the strength of the Lord. Though weak, I am strong. At times, I too make my camps as a defensive tool, yet amidts the camps I dance in victory rejoicing! On the one hand, I am weak and need the Lord, and yet I am one with Lord and am victorious in Christ the Victor! Like the Shulamite, As upon the dance of two camps, gaze at me Lord!

These Hands

Acts 20:

34 You yourselves know that these hands have ministered to my needs and to those who are with me.

35 In all things I have shown you by example that toiling in this way we ought to support the weak and to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He Himself said, It is more blessed to give than to receive.

In Acts 18:3b "they were tentmakers by trade", revealed what Paul did to make a living mainly so that he could serve the Lord without being a burden to the church nor to the saints, and yet be able to support the needs of the weaker saints. What a testimony! 

As I read this portion of the word and also from the message spoken by brother Watchman Nee in Church Affairs, Chapter 11,  the Lord enlightened me to see the proper way and attitude of serving the Lord. It is not for living that we serve the Lord, nor as a profession as in any secular job. We serve the Lord because we love Him, we love Him because He first loved us and has chosen us. We have no other option, even if there are many; we have no other way among the many ways; because the Lord has chosen us and captured us by His love. 

Since we love Him, we serve Him; and yet we are still man in the flesh with many physical, psychological and spiritual needs as any living and normal human does, so as not to stumble for these needs, we labor, even much more than any others, with "these hands" to make a living so that we can serve the Lord whom we love to the uttermost.

"These hands" also was a testimony of Paul; he kept himself pure in his motive in material needs in not being burdensome to and dependent on somebody else for his living, not that he did not have faith to trust in the Lord for his needs, but that in the principle of incarnation, labored as a tent maker to meet his basic physical needs and that of the needy saints with him. It was God who gave him the strength and the blessing to labor with his hands. 

Having spoken to by the Lord, it is my heart's desire too, as Paul, that as much as the Lord blessed, I would willingly labor with "my hands" trusting in the Lord to bless the fruit of "these hands" labor to supply the basic necessity and serve the Lord with all purity. This is not "not to have faith" but the exercise of faith to "till the ground that God may send the rain." Far be it from me that my service be dependent on or burdensome to some, instead I be a blessing to others both physically and spiritually, trusting in the Lord and having and exercising faith to bless and provide all my needs through "these hands." Having expressed this, it is upto the Lord to ultimately decide how I may serve Him. My faith, my trust, my provision, my Jehovah Jireh is and always will ever be God and Him only.

With all purity in heart, I may serve Him, laboring with "these hands" as He so ordained and blessed that the word of the Lord be fulfilled in me too that "It is more blessed to give than to receive."

Naming Children

Unexpected and unprepared we were for the third blessing of the womb, yet the Lord was the Lord and His way always were His ways and we just said "amen."

The Lord has taught me a lot of lessons through His blessings unsearchable. I, in my immature discernment, thought it sufficient for just two but the Lord knew best. He gave us one more beyond our expectation and perception. One the one hand He dealt with my thoughts and  on the other hand, He blessed us richly. A double blessing indeed! Through this He taught me a life lesson that "He is the Lord, and He ever will be and that I just trust in Him and fully depend on Him only."

When I got engaged to my wife out of God's sovereign will, she expressed her concern that she might not be able to bear a child. But my apt and innate response was that I would marry her not for a child but for the Lord's sake. It was upto the Lord whether we would ever be parent or not. The Lord was faithful and gracious. Now He has blessed three to the one who would physically not bear one, for health reason. God was and is above medical sciences.

Out of the Lord's blessings, for joy we named our first baby, BLISS -- a subjective experience of the sweetness and goodness of God. Then, the Lord blessed us a baby boy, knowing truly our heart's desire, and we named him, AMANA -- meaning high peak truth, an objective apprehension of the height of the Lord's marvelous, divine and mystical revelation, and co-incidentally my service to the Lord was also assigned in the literature service in the year he was born. He, as the Head, Christ, apportioned His member as He wills, and to this I say, "Amen!". And then, though we had satisfactorily settled for two, the Lord's blessing was bountiful. He blessed us further with the third baby. We named her, CHRISTY -- a feminine name of Christ, at least to my reckoning of the name, as the realisation of the subjective "bliss" and objective "amana." Christ is the reality of all the subjective experiences and enjoyment of God and of all the objective truths, visions and  revelation of the Bible. So here are God's blessings--Bliss, Amana and Christy.

That's how our children were named.

Lord, as Thou blest, so shall Thine be;

Lord, do Thou what pleaseth Thee.

We consecrate our own and our all to Thee,

May Thy will be done, yea Thine only.

Willing and Working

Philippians 2:13

13 For it is God who operates in you both the ⁴willing and the working for His good pleasure.

---

13⁴ The willing is within; the working is without. The willing takes place in our will, indicating that God's operation begins from our spirit (cf. 4:23) and spreads into our mind, emotion, and will. This corresponds with Rom. 8, where we see that God works from our spirit (Rom. 8:4), through our mind (Rom. 8:6), and eventually into our physical body (Rom. 8:11).   http://online.recoveryversion.org/FootNotes.asp?FNtsID=6012

The Lord's rhema speaking is so timely and intimate these days. He loves me so  much despite all my failures and short comings. One verse that shines out in my time with the Lord is Philipians 2:13. God operates in me! The Greek word for "operates" has the thought of God's moving, acting and working within us. Here the source of the operation is God, the means of the operation is also God and finally, the goal of the operation is also God! What a God indeed is our God!

This verse encourage me so much so that I even texted to some saints and new ones I am shepherding. Many times there are life's challenges and the task assigned to us on this temporary journey seems tough and mostly uncertain. Yet the word of  the Lord says, He is the one operating; yes operating in me the willing to carry out His will and the strength to carry out what He wills. So it is ultimately He who is the cause of willing and also ultimately He is the means to carry out His will. O what a blessing.

Often I struggled to seek God's will; but actually the "will-er" of the "willing" is God Himself. He operates in me the willing and I need to be exercised in my spirit to be one with what He is willing within me and through me. Even after His will is made known, foolish as I am, I tried to carry out the willing with my strength only to find myself in desperate hopelessness. As He willed, so He worked. He not only wills in me, but also supplies all the strength I need to carry out His willing within me. And all these for His purpose. So, the ultimate goal of everything God does in me and through me or in us and through us is for His purpose. Hallelujah! I need not struggle nor waver in vain. But abide in Him that He abide in me for His purpose. Praise Him!

Lord, thank you for your operation--the willing and the working for Your purpose!

Mending

The recent national conference in Chennai has such an impact on me and one particular speaking of the Lord is the matter of "mending." John was a fisher man who became the Lord's disciple, a witness and an apostle. He wrote one of the gospels and also his epistles carrying out the mending ministry among the believers the enemy tried his best to shift them to and fro with all kinds of fiery darts of false teachings attributing to the degradation of the churches. His mending ministry was the issue of the degradation among the believers.

This applies to me so subjectively as well. I am called to be a fisher of men, as many other believers are, just as much the same as John himself. Fishing is done with a fishing net; the effectiveness of the fish very much depends on the net itself with the fisherman. Both are vitally important. One without the other is useless and both must be in "good" condition, a good fisherman with a good fishing net!

In general, all genuine believers are fishermen, and in particular, I am a fisherman. My person, my living, my very being must be a fisherman. The work I do is fishing and I do the work with the fishing net. If my "fisherman" and "fishing net" are not matching or are not good enough, there will be a problem in my catching "fish," in fact, I may not net a fish at all. To be effective fisherman, my living and my work must be one in the divine profession of fishing. If either of these has any loopholes, it will directly affect my fishing. 

The Lord deeply touched me in this matter. The fact is, I have too many holes in my net. Apart from that, my net is not strong enough to even hold the fish I might have netted in this profession. The timely spekaing of the Lord, "the mending ministry of John" was really amazing. I bow my head to the Lord in absolute reverence that He, the Fisherman, may grant me a net without holes and a net with much strength. And that He grace me in His mending ministry to mend all my holes to be well pleasing to Him in my "fishing." 

My prayer ever since has been that the Lord may mend all the hole in my living, in my character, in my person and being that I truly may be His fisher man. "Lord, mend my net and mend all my holes."

Divine Realm

Since the Lord's mercy led me to the church-life, I have been hearing the phrase, "divine realm" time and again. But little did I realise its true worth. This phrase is so familiar to me that it almost lost its true depth to me. Nevertheless, thank the Lord, the fact was made known to me, at least I am not kept in the dark as far as the truth of the Bible and the divine revelation is concerned.

Of late, the Lord deeply touched me of this matter. The "Divine Realm" is a realm in which a Christian must live and have his being in it. But in my real-life experience I have a very little, in fact, too little experience of the being in the divine realm.

As the majority of the believers do, in longing to live an overcoming life, all this while there has been a struggle to attain to such a living as one would call "spiritual" or "overcoming." But little do I realise the core of the matter. It is not a matter of struggling nor or any human or supernatural effort that can make one overcoming. If the fact is the involvement of one's effort, truly it is not in the divine realm. For a divine realm does not demand anything natural. Once one is in the divine realm, the act to struggle cease, there will be no need to coerce to do anything good or bad. For the divine realm is fully divine in nature and essence, truly of God, in God, through God and unto God.

This simple exercise of the human spirit indwelt by the Spirit of God in the believers is the key to enter and live in the divine realm. Though I know this key too well doctrinally, immature as I am, I lack the experience of living and walking in the divine realm all the time. This is possible when one is living and walking in the Spirit.

I have been struggling too in my own affairs of life. Though doctrinally I know I should not, but I need the grace not to struggle but simply be in and live in the divine realm. O how much I need the grace of the Lord and the life supply from the Lord moment by moment to live such a life in the divine realm. This is my heart's longing. Not that I have never been, but that how consistently I am in the divine realm. And encouragingly enough, I discovered that the possibility of living in the divine realm is much much more in the Body life, in the church-life with the other members of the Body than being just in one self, individualistically. A decade ago, I was a spiritual giant in myself, but now the Lord blends me in the Body life to live in the divine realm.

One fine morning, the Lord spoke to me that all that I need is just to be in the divine realm. My Lord knows what life I have been going through and His sweet encouraging word is that I must live in the divine realm. When the Lord spoke to me this phrase, I woke up and this phrase has ever been reverberating into my being over and over again. O "the divine realm!"

God's Favor : An Atheist Believed!

Genesis 6:8 But Noah found favor in the sight of Jehovah.

In this wicked and perverted generation, the only way to be well pleasing to God is finding favor in the sight of Jehovah. Apart from God's favor, none can stand the wiles of the enemy. 

This matter of "favor" touched me so deeply these days. As I know myself, if not for the favor of God, the grace of God, I would have been worst than the worst of beasts. Learning this lesson, I dare not condemn any soul, however sinful he or she may seem to be, for it is His grace only that I am what I am today.

Last night, four new ones visited us and we had prepared a love-feast for them. One of them was an intelligent engineering student, an atheist or at best, an agnostic. We began our friendly talk on variety of topics with questions and answers on the astronomy, the universe, the Creator of this universe, the plan of this Creator God and the making of man-the trichotomy, the fall of man, the incarnation of the unique Creator God, the salvation accomplished at the cross and resurrection to be the life-giving Spirit, the need of man for God, the way and goal of receiving this God. Through this friendly conversation, the gospel of Jesus Christ was preached. And he specially found favor in the eyes of God; God graced him to believe into Him and was later baptised. Hallelujah!

Actually, no one is an absolute atheist. It's only that he believed in "no God" because he has not heard yet or perhaps, heard about God but have not experienced the true and living God yet. So there is a need for the harbinger of the glad tidings of GOD.

An aspiring astronaut, an atheist and an agnostic, believed and baptised into the Name of Jesus Christ! This is finding favor in the sight of Jehovah. Not of man's planing or doing in any way, but of God. It was neither of the one who preached nor the one who listened, though both are really crucial, but it is of God who shows favor and grace to man.

This is a deep lesson for me, as I reckon myself unworthy of witnessing such a salvation to a one who is entirely new to the Lord Jesus Christ and reckoning myself unworthy of being a channel for Him to verbally speak Him forth, for I know too well my frailty and vanity. No merit to none else, but God. It is God who favors. 

Lord, may I ever find favor in Your sight.