Weeping

Oh that my head were waters,

And my eye a fountain of tears,

That I might weep day and night

For the slain of the daughter of my people! 

                                             Jeremiah 9:1

Jeremiah wept on behalf of God for the chosen people of God, Israelite, for He loved them even in His disciplining. This verse touched me deeply as the Lord has burdened me to pray earnestly for some saints who have backsliden or are not very positive with the Lord's move today. These saints are directly or indirectly brought to the Lord and in the church life through the Lord's grace abounding in me. In a sense, they are my spiritual children in the Lord.

I have done my best to shepherd them in all ways possible; if perhaps, I might have missed some ways, excepting those. Now and then, I tried to call them and text them. But the result does not seem forthcoming. However, I am not discouraged. It only reminds me of my stubbornness too, some decades ago, if not for His mercy that make me what I am today. When all ways failed or does not seem effective at the moment, the only solution is to weep for them. 

Recently a brother's  fellowship on caring for the new ones helped me a lot. When all fellowship of recovering the new ones failed, the only way remaining is to weep for them out of deep and heavy burden before the Lord.

This was the pattern of the apostle Paul. Acts 20: 19 Serving the Lord as a slave with all humility and tears and trials which came upon me by the plots of the Jews; serving the Lord as a slave with all humility and tears. Perhaps, he must have wept for the saints he was shepherding. No wonder, they all loved him and honored him. What a pattern!

As I considered and prayed for the list of saints and seekers yet to be saved, the Lord burdened me to continuously intercede for them day by day. I do not need to shed crocodile's tear, in trying to follow a patter, but as the burden for these ones grows stronger and stronger, shedding tears and weeping for them and their salvation is by life and spontaneous. It is a genuine burden issuing in tears of love, care and concern.

When I was saved, the burden for my family grew so much. I remembered one night, praying and groaning for my family the whole night with tears. I had no words to utter in prayer, as words would not suffice to describe the burden which was so heavy laden within. The only thing I could do was to kneel and intercede for my family members, one by one. The burden was not soon released then. It continued the following days and months and even years, until all of them were saved one by one. Well that's for my own family in the flesh. Now the burden is far higher; for the saints and new ones, of whom physically I have no relation with, except that of the Lord, in the Lord. The Lord is training me how to be a proper shepherd caring for the flock of God.

Lord, grace me to shepherd Your flock faithfully even with weeping.