Experiences Enlarged

When I was much younger in the Lord I would love the cherishing with praises of others for any matter whatsoever. In fact, such applause would even enthused me to do more supplementary deeds seeking the praises of men and secretly glorying in the complements of novices alike. Not nullifying all these, as they were apt for those days of such as I was, but now, by the Lord's mercy, having grown a bit more and learning more lessons of life, I would go before the Lord and humbly acknowledge His grace if there is anything praiseworthy; not mine own, but His.

These days, the lessons I have been learning are mostly with the critics within and opposers without. To both the pandemic and the panacea is "Christ, and Him crucified." I only have to care for being one Spirit with the Lord. If this condition is met from my side, all is at rest. For the opposer would only be opposing Christ and the critics would be criticizing Christ, not me, for I am in Christ, one with Christ. In fact, the Christian life is just this; being in Christ and living Christ.

Of late, I have been experiencing the bitter sweetness of being opposed or criticized. The grace of the Lord has been abundant enough to bear whatever the negative speakings, for all were misconstrued, taken out of context and blown out of proportion. In such incidents I went before the Lord and do "health check-up" and listen to what the Lord has to say. Most of the time, the Lord's smile was with me and I have not veered from His will. As long as there is a perfect peace and joy of the Lord within, what others say does not really mean anything, and must all be taken to the Lord in prayer. Unless the Lord specifically leads, not even an iota of thought should be entertained for vindication. A must remembrance, we are still men in the flesh and should not trust in ourself. Leave all matters to the Lord; He knows best: what to do, when to do and how to do.

The Lord has been gracing me enough to smile and take all attacks and criticisms as much as He allows. When an elder brother of my father's age bluntly points finger at me with all fabricated assumption, some half truth and mostly false allegation, I listened to him in pin drop silence with not a word of reftation, for I reckon it folly to do so. Deep within, I only pray that the Lord will grant him the grace to see the reality of what the Lord has been doing these days. In fact, the Lord's blessing is pouring which he fails to see. And in time he will see and glorify the God of glory from Whom are all things and to Whom are all things.

Such cases are nothing new to me, as my own father had done years ago until he finally received the Lord and I had to baptise him on his request. And since then, he stopped all negative speakings. The same seems to happen now and then with somene who does not really see the reality of all that has been happening these days. Little am I bothered by such, as I am assured that in time, all will be well as it is already well.

These are some experiences on the negative side, the Lord allows for my growth and perfecting in serving Him. Without the cross, there can be no resurrection; without out death, there can be no life released; and without suffering, there can be no genuine transformation. The fiery sun only helps the harvest ripens as only birth pangs brought forth a new born.

To all these wonderful experiences enlarged, I give glory to God and praise Him for all His multifarious wisdom. As much as His grace graces me, the more the better.

Lord, enlarge my experiences of You. 

Family Enlarged

Under the Lord's sovereignty, my sister's daughter came to stay with us for her education. This brought in a very well knit family tie within our family, especially within my sibling. As we stay together as a family for a couple of months now, the Lord reminded me of my need to be enlarged and be broad-hearted in shepherding. Through the Lord's mercy, we are blended together as one family and we, me and my wife, reckon my sister's daughter as our own too, adding to the three the Lord already blessed us with. She being elder than our own children, we have reckon her as our "eldest daughter" and the rest should look up to her as such. With this new blessing, we are now a family of four children.

Humanly speaking too, it is justified for me to reckon her as my eldest daughter as my sister had lost her husband when her only begotten daughter was just about five months old. Subjectively, she never knew what a daughter is to her father and never had any opportunity to call any one "daddy." In blood relation I am her uncle yet I would rather that she take me as her "dad" and I treat her as my "daughter" as I do to the other two daughters. To this effect I have fellowshipped with my wife, my burden and educated our children to consider her as their eldest sister. 

In fact, I also fellowshipped in our family time that I accepted her as my daughter and that she reckon me as her dad. This is a comfort to my sister as she cares for her daughter so much and would do anything for her well being. Thus from all angle, it is deemed she be our eldest daughter and be organically a member of our family too.This is our family enlarged, and the Lord's blessing.

Still learning to be a father to my own children, and with this addition, I am learning more lessons of life. Personally, I prefer life to grow and develop on its own, and in time we will learn what all are needed to learn. Life matters are not taught and learned, but are experienced and learned. So we embarked on a journey of life to learn and learn, learn of the Lord. 

Thank you Lord for the added grace, extended blessing and a new member into our family. As You enlarged our family, so also enlarge our heart to love and care as You would.  

God's Promise

Psalm 2:8   

Ask of Me, 

And I will give the nations as Your inheritance 

And the limits of the earth as Your possession.

This is the promise of God during my time with Him a week ago. My impromptu reply to the Lord's promise was, North India and North East India! These are the two regions that the Lord implanted His burden into my heart. Not mine, but His. And time and again, the Lord proved to me that my calling and service on the gospel preaching, shepherding and perfecting is for these two regions. Though at the moment I seem to confront a stiff opposition from the enemy without, but my burden is nevertheless lightened, but much more strengthened by the day.

At times, during my time with the Lord, the burden within me was so strong that I told the Lord that by His grace I am willing to be martyred. Only if He grants this special mercy, that will be an honor, and in His absolute sovereignty for His glory. Despite the outward ambiance of spiritual drought, dryness and deadness, the aura within is complete peace, joy and love for the people of these regions. Though vivid fruits may not have been manifested as yet, still the seed of the divine life have been sown to quite a number of the local ones; many have believed into Jesus Christ, some have been baptised, few have come to the church life, and to my faith and hope, many are awaiting the free gift of God, the Lord Jesus Christ.

Even to this regard, the Lord has been working on me and my family to adapt to the local lifestyle, language and living. In fact, many legal documents pertaining to me and my family are as per the law of this land. And I am happy about it. I love the people and the land. And I am mingling with the locals, some of them are now my dear brothers in Christ with whom I can pray and fellowship with, even on a daily basis. What a joy it is to be in the will of the Lord! And what He asked me of and what I asked from Him, is all in conformity to His will for me and my family.

Besides, in my dealing with the people of these regions, the Lord graces me His special blessing and anointing. Every time I am in fellowship or in contact with the people, there always is s special grace to carry out what was intended to. For this is, indeed, the sure promise of the Lord, in burden, in vision and in goal, I have asked of the Lord, these regions as the "nation" for His inheritance.

God asked of me to ask of Him, and so I asked for "the gospelization, the truthization and churchization of the North India and the North East India." 

Lord, may Your will be done!

Shepherding : As Father and Mother

1 Thessalonians 2:7  But we were gentle in your midst, as a nursing mother would cherish her own children.11 Just as you know how we were to each one of you, as a father to his own children, exhorting you and consoling you and testifying,

In shepherding the saints the Lord taught me this very important lesson of being a "mother" and a "father" to the ones He bestowed as "guardian." For reason of time and space, I have tried to "hand over" the shepherding of the new ones under my care to the saints in their vicinity. In fact, once I introduced them I left the responsibility of shepherding to them, trusting that all would go well. But later, I discovered that all is not well all the time. The way an "uncle or aunty" would care for children is entirely different form how a "mother and father" would care. For life relationship itself is entirely different. Even with utmost care and concern, the heartbeat of a mother and father is different from that of somebody else. Life relationship cannot be transferred, so is genuine shepherding. This is what I have been learning and experiencing all this while.

A doctor couple, a bureaucrat and a lecturer, an IT engineer, a business manager, retired officials,..whom the Lord has graced me to shepherd them to Him and had been shepherding them for quite sometime, but due to my limited-ness I had "transferred" them to some other brothers and sisters for the follow up shepherding. Though some shepherding is going on for some interval, I ultimately discovered the lack and the urgent need for me to still continue to shepherd them. The genuine care of a nourishing mother and exhorting father can never be replaced by none other, however spiritual or mature someone may be. Father is father and mother is mother and it will always be. Nothing can alter this parental relationship. Not nullifying the function and shepherding of other brothers and sisters to take over, but stating the fact as subjectively as it is.

Since last month I have been burdened by the Lord all over again to still continue the shepherding of all these dear ones despite the factor of time and space. So I freshly decided to continue at least the phone call prayer-fellowship-shepherding at least once a week. Glad that the Lord reminded me and is training me to be a proper nourishing mother and exhorting father.

I know I have my limitation and shortcomings; and often, I tend to "transfer" the shepherding under the cloak of coordination, but the Lord reminded me again and again, never to give up on anyone, for whatever reason. Praise the Lord for this lesson of shepherding.

Lord, make me a proper shepherd; shepherding as father and mother.

Fellowship in the Body: Receiving Supply

Personally I often feel sometimes I am down and out, but the blessed truth is that I am in the Body and am being supported and strengthened by the Lord through the Body. If it is my own personal individual spirituality, when I am high I will be full of self-exaltation and and when I am down I will be full of self-condemnation. Praise the Lord, the Lord has been delivering me from myself into Himself in His Body. 

Few days ago, a time of fellowship with a more mature brother for few hours was so supplying. On the one hand I was exposed of where I lack behind; my failures, shortcomings, etc., yet on the other hand, I was so supplied through the fellowship. In fact, I was very much strengthened to love the Lord more and pursue Him much more. Though objectively inexplicable in utterance and subjectively mysterious in experience, I sensed the love and care of the Lord expressed in and through the Body, and for the Body. What a blessing! I have never seen Jesus Christ in the flesh nor many brothers who have now gone to be with the Lord, still in fellowship with brothers like him, I could experience the Christ speaking and ministering through the members of His Body. What a grace that I, even such as I, could participate in the Lord's blessing.

Another experience is the visitation of another elderly brother who is also as mature, ministering life to me, especially in my area of service as the Lord has apportioned it to me. Simple, sweet and slow, the divine life is being supplied. There is no sense of religious loyalty nor superstitious  supremacy, but mutual fellowship and supply to one another. Age no bar, race no bar and nationality no bar, but fellow member of the Body of Christ, brother in Christ! Where can such experience be enjoyed, except in the proper church-life in the Body of Christ? My understanding of the Body life is getting deeper, and my experience, sweeter. Every fellowship with the saints is an experience of Christ and the enjoyment thereof. What a blessing that Christ, the Head, graces me the fellowship in the Body!

Here, in the Body life, there is no room for Satan to point his finger and accuse me. I am not a lone Christian fighting a solo battle, but I am just a member of the Body of Christ with Christ as the Head who has already crushed the devil's head under our foot. My struggles are not mine alone, nor strong points, but everything is in the Body, with the Body and for the Body. Praise the Lord!

The fellowship of the Body, in the Body, for the Body is a blessing. Lord, preserve me in your Body all the days of my life!    

Answered Prayers

The Lord generally has three types of answer as He always answers prayer. His answer could be an affirmative "Yes", a negative 'No" or a passive "Wait." But He always answers all His children's prayers. Only one has to discern what is the Lord's answer.

Recently, the Lord encouraged me very much with affirmative "Yes," again and again, resounding. Of course, these have been answers to years of prayer. Whichever the answer may be, prayer is always a win-win exercise. The result of the prayer itself is worth praying for. The very act of praying and the answers to the prayer are always worthy. In fact, the act of prayer itself is the benefit of prayer, and much more, answers will be added in due time.  

In the past one month itself, the Lord has brought in three solid result to our prayers in the literature service, and two more are on the way. In our office, every morning we spend at least an hour of prayer and pursuing. It is not a mere obligation but an experience and enjoyment of the Lord. As we faithfully prayed for the need of the literature service in various languages and for various parts of India, the Lord bountifully blessed us. In time, He begins to answer our prayer one by one.

One particular language was suffering for lack of proper serving ones, but the Lord is now filling up the lack and a new beginning is dawning. The Lord is faithful and meets His own need. This particular experience is very encouraging to me.

When in one spirit with the Lord, every prayer uttered is the Lord's prayer and the Lord will always answer His prayer through us. Our simple responsibility is to exercise to be one spirit with the Lord by being in the mingled spirit. This brings us to the basic Christian living as in Romans 8:4 "That the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who do not walk according to the flesh but according to the spirit.", 1 Timothy 4:7 "exercise yourself unto godliness", Galatian 5:16 "But I say, Walk by the Spirit and you shall by no means fulfill the lust of the flesh," 25 "If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit."

Lord, grace me such a basic living and walking in the Spirit.

Presumption

A great and grave danger of a mindset is "presumption." Often many, including myself, have the habit and temptation of "counting the chickens before it hatches." The paradox is, without any certainty of what the future might hold, one presumes things as though it has already been so. And to a sarcastic surprise, what comes out in reality is often the exact opposite of what was presumed to be.

Not merely once have I been a victim of such mindset, it has happened again and again. I hope I learn this lesson well this time.

Yesterday, I visited a sister who was admitted in a hospital for "dengue." My observation was that she was recovering as her blood platelet counts was above 60. I comforted her and presumed confidently that she will be alright and was not that burdened at all, even for prayer. What a grave oversight. And this morning I was informed that her platelet counts went down to below 30 and was very critical. Not only so, I received a mail and a message about the seriousness of her health condition. This was a big lesson for me, not to presume anything before its confirmation.

This reminds me of my need for more carefulness in saying anything before hand and not to take things for granted. But to commit everything to the Lord in prayer that the will of the Lord be done, and not my presumption. 

On the flip side, this is also indeed an attack of the enemy as this sister had passed through much struggling and had decided to join the full time training in truth and church services. Besides, she is also a core team member for the gospel preaching in a reputed university in New Delhi. On the one hand its a spiritual battle, yet on the other hand its a spiritual lesson for me.

I have had enough experiences of my presumptions being nullified, and I am still learning this simple lesson. Though I trust my brothers in many things, still the Lord would allow some "exceptional cases or unavoidable circumstances" to withhold my plan and make my presumption void, though ultimately things will be cleared up later. It was the hand of God for me to learn my lesson, of not being presumptuous but depend on the Lord step by step, trusting Him all the way through.

Praise the Lord for the lesson of "not to be presumptuous."

Lord, grace me to be so.